Road Trip (H.S.)

Chapter 42

Felicity

Just about two and a half hours have gone by since the phone call with my dad. Harry and I are currently stopped at a gas station in what feels like the middle of nowhere. You'd think that from five hours of driving we would be out of Texas or close to the border, but no. I never realized how big Texas is until now when we are driving in the state and have yet to cross a border. I think we are still three hours from New Mexico, and after that we have near four hours until Albuquerque. We'll be in this car for an eternity. I'm going to be sick of this car, and I'm pretty sure Harry and I will be sick of each other by the time we end our traveling for the day. I can't wait until we get to our hotel in Albuquerque so I can collapse on the bed and pass out. 

Speaking of the hotel ... my dad sent me a rather lengthy text message after booking the room. Apparently because it is holiday season and our reservation is last minute, he was only able to get one room, which I assured him is not a big deal. Harry and I have been sharing rooms this entire trip ... sharing another room tonight will be no different. My dad then informed me that there is only one bed, and as much as he knows that I am an adult and he cannot control my actions, he strongly encourages that there be no hanky panky between Harry and me. Although, that was before a second text message was sent asking that I just be safe in whatever I do. But I mean, I don't think any of that will be happening anyway. 

It's sweet, really. I find it touching that he's trying to act like a real concerning father about this kind of stuff. He's always brushed off anything between Colton and me. My dad is not an oblivious man; I'm sure he's aware of things that have happened. But he has never tried to get involved in it or speak with me about it or even talk with Colton. This is both strange and amusing for him to now act this way.

As I wait for the gas tank to fill up, I watch Harry as he walks around a grassy area off to the side of the parking lot. From my spot by the car, I can't tell whether or not he's having a pleasant conversation with whomever is on the phone with him. At times he looks distressed and confused, but the next second he will be grinning widely and laughing. A couple of times he's glanced over at me, making eye contact before smiling and waving. 

Each time he smiles I feel myself smile in return. I like to see him happy and laughing and enjoying himself. For one, it makes this trip a lot more fun. But of course, it just makes me happy to see him like this. 

The longer I observe his behaviors and learn about who he is, the more I find myself falling for him. He is just so sweet, not only to me but to everyone else we cross paths with. He's kindhearted, considerate and charming. Honestly, there are so many things I could positively say about him. I don't think there's anything I dislike ... except for his preferences for air temperature in the car. That is something we will never agree on. The same goes for radio stations. The things about him that might annoy me are only trivial. 

I'm falling for Harry, and I'm falling fast. It's scaring me how quickly this is all happening. It's overwhelming yet exciting. It's also a bit worrying to see how fast I've lost every feeling I once had toward Colton and replaced them with feelings toward Harry. That probably looks really bad on my part, but I can't help it. Even when Colton and I first got together I never felt this way ... and I thought I really liked him. 

But the scary truth is that I think I love Harry. And if this is what it is like to really love someone, then I never loved Colton. Come to think of it, I've never said I loved him, and he's never said he loved me. What kind of relationship is this that we've had for four years? Have I seriously been this blind to not notice that a huge part of any relationship has been missing from ours?

Love is a scary thing to think about. It's both scary and exciting. On one hand it makes me feel happy and on top of the world, and I want to let everyone know about it. But on the other hand, I'm afraid to tell Harry because I don't want him to freak out. He's a guy and we haven't known each other that long. For me to throw out the L-word at him will scare him off. So for now, I'm torn about what to do.