The Bad Boys Baby

Chapter 23 - The Break

         Isabelle's P.O.V

        It's been a month since I went to the hospital. Every day is a struggle not to freak out about what will happen if I do this or that. I can't think properly. Not only that Ryder won't stop blowing up my phone. I want to chuck it at a wall sometimes and I'm not sure he even knows about my breakdown last month. I still wasn't ready to talk to him. I wasn't supposed to stress and he just might be my main source of it. 

        Flashback

       My meltdown lasted minutes before my mom noticed my absence. "Honey, you alright?" She knocks and whispers. 

      Sucking in a bunch of air before being able to speak, I finally say, "I'm bleeding."

      "Oh, sweetheart. Can I come in?" 

      "M'hm."

      I unlock the door. She pulls me into a hug. I sniffle in her ear and look up at Noah. Noah looks like he has no idea what to do. Like the world around me is crashing and he has no way of helping me. The nurse advises me to sit down. When I tell her my symptoms, she quickly nods. "It might not be anything to worry about," she says. "The cramping feeling can be numerous things. We're going to just check everything out, okay?"

     "Okay," I let out. 

     "Have you been stressed more than usual?" 

     "No, not really. I mean..."

     As she looks up at the screen, she applies gel before tickling my stomach. The coldness is spread about my stomach as the nurse continues to stare at the screen and ask questions. I blurt the answers as if life itself depended on it and maybe one did. But she gives small smiles of reassurance.

         The air felt dense and hard to swallow. Everything is unbelievably slow. Nothing could be heard except the shuffling of the paper under me and My mom and Noah nonchalantly pacing around the room. And when she left the room without warning, my heart sped up, nearly pumping its way out of my chest. If I wasn't stressed before I surely was now. 

       In her absence, the time had somehow gotten even slower. I couldn't help but think the worse. Stuck under stares of worried faces and gloop all over me, my mind seemed to have been racing my heart. Asking myself questions like what if neither one of us are okay? What if she is already gone? What if she isn't healthy? But I stop the what-ifs and just relax. Close my eyes and take in some silence before being shortly interrupted. "It's all going to be alright. I know it will, Izzy," Noah said softly, rubbing the length of my forearm. 

       I found it slightly comforting, but his words meant nothing. He can't know what will happen. No one can.

       After a few more anxiety-filled minutes, the nurse returns with my O.B. Quickly apologizing for her abrupt disappearance, she shows the doctor a sheet attached to a yellow clipboard and the screen. He nods as he flips through a few sheets of papers and then returns his attention to the grey screen. Suddenly, the nurse begins to move the gel over me again and clicked some more buttons. It may have been no less than a minute but it felt like years. I wanted to express my anxiety but I thought it'd be right to stay relaxed, not because I wasn't supposed to panic or stress, but because this is their job; I shouldn't tell them how to do it, and, frankly, I was losing hope. 

      A revelation came over me when I heard the sweet sounds of loud thumping. It was music to my ears. Three, very long held sighs were released as I cry silent, happy tears. "Things seem to be fine. I think the cramps were just Braxton Hicks. Completely normal for your third trimester. There are a couple of things that we want you to be cautious of," the doctor assures, "Stress levels, physical activity, anything in that ballpark. But you should check in often to make sure everything stays copacetic."