Chapter 25: Being Good is Overrated

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UNEDITED 

"Jake you are cutting off my circulation." I say slowly in the elevator.

Jake is so focused on the number flashing 68 to 67 that he doesn't listen to me at first.

"Jake." I nudge him slightly.

He breaks out of his reverie and then looks at me slightly confused and then notices that he has a death grip on my hand and lets go.

Almost immediately the electric spark vanishes and I am left feeling quite numb.

I wish he hadn't left my hand.

"Sorry." He mumbles and shuffles.

The elevator opens and once again I am faced with the sight of a busy office.

This time everyone didn't blatantly stare at us but they sneaked glances. I turn to look at Jake who doesn't say anything and walks ahead keeping his eyes trained on the floor.

His usual presence of arrogance has dimmed and he walks ahead of me slowly like he is waiting for me to catch up.I speed up and resist the urge to stick out my tongue at all the female population in the office who are blatantly staring at Jake.

Yeah bitches I'm the one dating him not you.

Fake dating, my conscience corrects.

It doesn't feel fake.

I finally catch up with him and he holds my hand, lightly this time and leads me to the elevator. He doesn't look up even once and keeps his eyes trained at either the ground or straight ahead.But for now I am preoccupied with the tingles in my hand but Looking at him scares me. He looks completely tired and exhausted and can barely look up.

Because of his father.

Jake slowly presses the button and never once removes his eyes from the changing numbers.

I am serious about her.

Was it true? Did Jake really mean it?

The elevator doors open and I get in with Jake who presses 0 without hesitation and shuts the door on the prying eyes of the people in the office.

After a few moments standing in awkward silence I realise that his breathing has gotten heavier as if every single breath is painful for him.I let go of his hand and stand in front of him who is still looking down at his feet.

"Are you all right?" I say slowly and he nods still not looking at me.

"Jake." I say softly moving slightly closer,"It's okay."

He doesn't look up at me and I gently put my hands on his cheeks and look at him,"Please look at me."

He looks up and meets his eyes with mine. It breaks my heart and then mends it.

His eyes are brilliant green glassy and clear. But broken. The wall around him is shattered and I realise the key difference between his father and him.

His dad's eyes are cold and hard but Jake's eyes are the only way through the false armour he puts up.

He looks pale like he did when he was sick and for some reason it completely throws me off.

I can't think straight when Jake lets his armour down and lets me see his vulnerable side. It makes me scared and I want to slap him and ask him to get his annoying rude hot and cold attitude back.

Because without it I have no reason to run away from my feelings.

Oh Jake what have you done to me?

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