lost souls: rain, stars, and iced coffee

[40] winter. spring. summer. a u t u m n.

winter. spring. summer. a u t u m n.

winter.

your hands were so warm wrapped around mine, a friction not only from heat but something more than contact can create. as you look down at me, creating redness along my cheeks and neck, i smile in the luminescence of the moon looking up at the sky. so many stars were out tonight. i counted each and every shining dot, a habit i did when i get nervous. so nervous i barely noticed your fingers brushing my cheek, your thumb lifting my chin to peer into my eyes. your eyes were as dark as the december night sky and i found myself getting lost inside them, growing closer to them as you grew closer to mine. silence was all we knew in that moment, but it spoke millions of words. words unknown to us because they emitted feelings, not just letters molded into one. your lips touched mine, softly, suddenly, and on instinct my eyelashes fluttered closed. no thoughts rumbled around, for i was transfixed by cinnamon candy and mint toothpaste and a hint of tobacco. focused on nothing but you and a little bit by the butterflies in my stomach. when we pulled away and i opened my eyes, smiling so wide, you weren't in front of me anymore; instead you were behind me. darkness no longer surrounded me; instead grey clouds peered over me. frosty wind didn't bite at my skin; instead drops of rain soaked me.

spring.

"come on, eve," you called out to me, grabbing my wrist and dragging me across the field. my feet could barely keep up with yours as we ran, laughing, screaming. i felt infinite in a strange way. 

i tugged a little. "where are you taking me, zacharia williams?" i yelled through giggles. 

you looked over your shoulder at me, still running, still smiling, and said, "anywhere; everywhere. you and me." 

i swear to you my heart stopped.

the rain drowned out my ragged breathing, thankfully, so you didn't know i was getting tired. i was okay with being tired, i just knew you wouldn't be. i knew you'd stop running if you knew it was wearing me out, and i didn't want to stop just yet. spring rain hypnotized me almost as much as you did, and i wanted to keep going until i just couldn't anymore. with you. 

i just wanted to keep going with you until we both couldn't anymore, and at that point in time i didn't understand what i meant by that.

abruptly, you came to a halt. i did too. 

and we were falling. 

when my back hit the damp grass, i fell into a place where the sun is shining and the sky is blue and your in front of me. 

summer.

your basically naked as you continued to face me, both of us loitering in front of a sparkling blueish green body of water. you smirked. "take off your clothes."

i raised an eyebrow. "excuse me?"

"take. off. your. clothes."

"and why would i do that?" i questioned, clinging to my thin black fabric of a shirt. on the outside i was trying to remain calm and cool, but on the inside i was freaking out. we hadn't reached that level of intimacy just yet. we'd been together for only six months (yes, only) and you told me we didn't have to rush things, knowing my past and whatnot, so right now i was insanely confused.