Straight-Faced

day one

Today was the first day of Luke and I's week of dates, and I was pretty sure that I wasn't going to make it through alive. Nervous was below an understatement. This was the first time that I'd be going on a date with someone who I actually liked. I assumed that real life would be nothing like the TV shows I had acted in. What was I supposed to expect?

Logan wasn't answering any of my texts or calls, which didn't help. He thought that it would be a good idea for him to step away and cut back on the advice so that I could sort everything out on my own. While I appreciated that he was trying to help, I needed it to be in the form of actual... help. I didn't have any other friends who I was comfortable enough to vent to, and I was just less than desperate enough to ask my parents for advice.

Luke had suggested that I wear a disguise, and I think that he meant for me to put on a hat or something. But due to the facts that I was gay, and I had no life, I chose to go over-the-top.

Ever since I first started getting recognized in public, I had been coming up with disguises for whenever I didn't feel like interacting with anyone, which was most days. Over the years, I had gotten pretty creative, and I had built up a portfolio of characters. I had costumes of everything from middle schooler to your Great Aunt Jane.

Today, my outfit consisted of a hoodie, skinny jeans, and canvas sneakers; all black because I sucked at matching colors and patterns if it wasn't the button-ups that I usually wore. For makeup, I went for "high school girl who thinks that a smokey eye is a black hole". The trick to making myself unrecognizable, I learned, was to overdo the eye makeup. That meant way too much eyeshadow, way-too-thick eyeliner, and enough mascara to make my eyelashes look like tarantula legs. I didn't know what I was supposed to look like, but after studying myself in the mirror, I came up with "xtra without the e". Or alternatively, "tan scene kid who stopped trying".

I used half a can of hairspray to attempt to pull my life together, but that would only do so much for me. I wouldn't be surprised if I ended up sweating off all my foundation before I even got there.

The destination that Luke had picked for our date was called Happy Endings Cafe. I had never heard of it before, but after reading their online reviews, it seemed like a nice place for a first date. It was a cross between a coffee shop and a restaurant, and it didn't have enough business to keep the place constantly crowded. The less judgement I get for my ridiculous makeup, the better. Usually, I could handle it, but usually, I wasn't on a date.

The cafe wasn't too far away from my house, and I still had almost an hour left before our date. I figured that I could drive around town while blasting punk rock music to kill time and warm up to people giving me confused looks, so I checked my reflection in the mirror one more time before leaving my room.

Mami was in the kitchen, already starting on dinner. When she saw me, she did a double take. Then she shrugged, turned back around, and said, "Have fun, cariño." Both of my parents had learned to not question these things.

I inched through after-work traffic, and I still managed to arrive early. Luke had already seen how desperate I could get, so I knew being a few minutes early wouldn't add too much to whatever he thought of me. With that in mind, I decided that there was no reason for me to be embarrassed of showing up before time.

I walked in through a side door, and I spotted Luke almost immediately. I definitely got a few heads to turn as I trudged into the cafe. There weren't many people in here, but half of them did a double take when they saw me dragging my feet behind me. It wasn't the way that I'd usually walk, but dressing up was nothing if I didn't act the part. Plus, it was fun to be acting on my break. 

Luke was already sitting in a booth, and a girl sat across from him. She said something, and it made him blush. I had never seen this girl before, and I knew that it wasn't fair to make any assumptions. Still, I couldn't help but feel a little uneasy.