Paper Hearts (boyxboy)

The Party pt. 2

Andy:

Friday, April 17th 1989

11:32 P.M.

"Did he care?" Sara asks curiously.

I shrug. "Why would he? It's my money, well, my mom's money mostly."

"Yeah, but he doesn't care that you spent it on something so wasteful as this?"

I shake my head. Why do my friends have such a hard time grasping that Noah isn't a total meathead? They're constantly surprised that he treats me well, it's so disheartening.

I stop walking, realizing I forgot to stop by my locker. "Shit, I needed to grab my Calc book while we're here."

Mama rolls her eyes at me and goes on about wanting to leave, meanwhile I'm already heading back into the academic wing. I call out that I'll catch up with them, but Sara, Hannah, and Mama all decide to follow me and trail behind a few dozen feet. When I reach my locker, it takes me two tries to get the combination right, then open it up to find another crumbled piece of paper shoved in through the cracks. I don't even bother read it, just smash it into a ball in my palm and toss it behind me.

"What's that?" Hannah asks, picking it up.

"Don't worry about it, I get them all the time."

They're all silent for a minute, reading it quietly while I grab my book and close my locker. "Drewy... this is... Scary."

I scoff. "You should read the one Eric Johnson left me. I doubt it's worse than that."

Sara sets her hand on my shoulder. "No, they're totally threatening your life babe. You need to tell somebody about this."

I grip my textbook and give them an annoyed look. "I did. Last year. Guys, it's no big deal, okay? They're never going to actually do any of that," I grab the note and read it over quickly. "I mean, come on. 'Run your queer ass over,' that's ridiculous."

"You've been puttin up with this for a year?" Mama asks.

"I've been putting up with this for eighteen years." I walk over to the trashcan and throw it away. "Forget about it guys."

Sara crosses her arms at me. "Why didn't you tell us people are threatening you?"

"What are you going to do to fix it? Make the world not prejudice? Let's face it: I'm gay, some people don't like that. Some people hate that. The way I see it, I can let it bother me to the point of losing my mind, or I can take it with a grain of salt."

She comes up to me and take the book out of my hands, looking me dead in the eye. "Andrew, we care what happens to you. We're not going to let you be harassed. Does Noah know about this?"

I shake my head, realizing something. "Oh, my bad, I also have a third option. I can be completely oblivious to society's hatred and the suffering of people like me." They look at each other confusedly. "Oh yeah, that's a choice. I can be the gay guy who wants to pretend his boyfriend and all his friends aren't hated by the entire school."

"We may not exactly be popular, but nobody threatens our lives." Hannah softly chirps.

"Yeah," I concede, "but other than this dumb note thing, you guys have always known what this school thinks of me. Mama, you were there that day Brandon Maroone tripped me and 'accidentally' kicked my head." She nods sadly. "And Sara, you remember Phil Ret putting a paper that said 'fag' on my back, and no one told me until sixth period."

"That was awful, you cried for the rest of the period."

I nod. "The constant ridicule doesn't bother me anymore, I've had to get past it. It's when people go specifically out of their way to make me feel less than human, and my boyfriend doesn't even notice, that I get upset."