-Prologue: Life before the Fame.-

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(A/N: This story will have trigger and smut warnings in each chapter that has them. Some of these events have happened, which putting them in the story feels like giving it an actual and realistic feeling to it. With that being said, -TRIGGER WARNING-)


   My life isn't perfect. It never was. I was born into a family of drug addicts. Why was I placed into such a dangerous environment? All my childhood...wait, what childhood? I've been an adult for as long as I remember. Being the one to take care of my younger siblings while my parents were passed out on the floor, in a drug-induced high that was too close to an overdose. I've always had to watch my back too. Because of my environment, I was ALWAYS watching my back. Always locking my doors. Always making sure I was safe. Always making sure my siblings were safe. Soon enough, our addict-made family was broken apart by child services. I keep saying family...when in truth..it was just my mother. I was placed with my father and I thought all was fine after, I was wrong. I soon discovered that he was on cocaine, locking me out midst of the day. It was summer and I was only locked out with a bottle of water. I knew that I had to be the adult once again.



   As I grew up, I came to have two types of ways to escape the real world: YouTube and music. YouTube only led to video games being another outlet from my harsh reality. The more I grew though, the more I would dream of being a YouTuber. One day, it came to me actually doing it. What was stopping me? I barely did a thing on it though. It was a lot harder than I thought, so for a while, I gave up. 



   It then came to a time where my father gave me up and kicked me out, even going as far as to nearly choking me, just to make me leave. The drugs were back again after him being clean for six years. So I left and moved in with a friend, but it was clear after a while, they hated having another child around, especially a child that wasn't biologically theirs. Because of that, I found myself empty and numb. My only joy was from YouTubers such as Markiplier, PewDiePie, I AM WILDCAT, and many more. That was...until I found out a boy liked me at my school. I liked him a lot too, but we were both very shy. I felt the same joy I found when on YouTube, that same genuine happiness. By that point in life, I had depression, anxiety, and eating disorders from past events in life. 



   I then dated that boy for nearly two years. He promised me the world, but who doesn't when in high school? He took care of me at low points in my life, even when my older brother committed suicide. After that, I thought I knew he was the one, but I was wrong. Only a couple months later from the death of my brother, he left me for a girl notorious for playing guys and being absolute trash. That's when everything was clear...I wasn't meant to be happy. The depression came back ten times worse than it was before, the eating disorders I had only turned to me not eating. When I did eat, I'd force myself to puke it up. I even tried to kill myself a couple times. I would cry more and more when no one was around. This lead to me not trusting ANYONE at all. I avoided new boys who came, sometimes forced myself in a relationship, but I would lose the feelings. I eventually gave up and stayed to myself. 


   Out of all that, I soon found motivation. Motivation to do YouTube again, so I immediately began. Because I was so prone to raging, I guess it made it way funnier than it should have been. Soon, the videos were discovered and blew up for their cute covers and VERY angry shouts and noises. I then found myself making more money than I thought would be made. I then opened a bank account and started saving until I got a car, then an apartment, after that was better equipment. I eventually saved enough to move a state over for a couple of months. In those short months, I went conventions and expos. I was recognized and fans wanted to take pictures with me, have them sign things, be in a SnapChat video with them, and chitchat with them. I didn't mind any of it, but it soon gave me the same genuine happiness I had long ago. That's when I knew everything was going to be okay. 



   I then went to an RTX convention, because by this time, I was completely engulfed with Cow Chop and the people in it. My fans knew how much I loved their videos and how I now always anticipated UberHaxorNova and ImmortalHD's videos on their own channels. They would make fan art of me meeting James and Aleks, basically supporting my dream of meeting them. Some of them though suspected I had a crush on Aleks due to the way I would talk about him, they assumed right.  It wasn't till that RTX convention that I actually met them. It was by accident though. I was walking off after a couple of fans stopped me for pictures and my anxiety was high. I was always scared to talk to people. Not a very good quality for a YouTuber to have, I know. As I was walking though, I heard someone shout at me. I stop, being startled by it and turn. To my surprise, it was James Wilson himself. He said he was hoping to meet me that day. He even admitted that he became a fan of mine when the tweets started. We had a nice chat, a very long chat, but a nice one. He then brought me over and introduced me to the Cow Chop crew, well...the ones who were there at least.  It was Trevor, Brett, Aleks, Asher, and Joe. They all told me hi and went on about their business, but my eyes stayed on Aleks a little longer than expected. When I noticed, I scared myself by jerking straight up. James laughed and after that, we exchanged numbers. He wanted to start doing videos with me, and for sure I didn't reject.


   After a couple months from that encounter, James offered me a job at Cow Chop. I didn't hesitate with an answer. I said yes and he decided to get everything ready for me at the office. I was already in the process of moving to Los Angeles, so it was a perfect. It was a hard move, but in the end it was worth it.


   Now, three years later, I live in Los Angeles. I'm a YouTuber. I work at Cow Chop as well. I became close friends with James and Aleks, being one of the ones to do dangerous stunts as well. It was great, until the day that that boy.... that one boy who destroyed the happiness he once gave me...messaged me. This is where is all began...

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