Little stories

Atelphobia

It's the fear of not being good enough.

You know, people only start to miss you when they fail to replace you... so in that sense you can be good enough... you are good enough.

You just don't know it yet.

You're tired of acting stronger than how you feel and sit there feeling guilty and pathetic whenever you do talk about your feelings, why do you feel so bad about it?
You can scream and you can most definitely cry but you can not give up. Giving up is the wrong option, you're letting it win.

We're far too young to be this broken, were far too young to feel like we're not good enough... we're far too young.

You sit there. The urge to cry. But you can't.

Instead you stare into space, your back either pressed against the softness of your mattress or the hard hollow floor of you bedroom. And instead of crying you let your heart break into a million tiny pieces, because that's all you can do. Sit and stare.

The mind is a very dark place, a place over run by endless thoughts that are not even relevant, thoughts that turn what was once sweet sour.
But how can emptiness feel so heavy? How can loneliness feel so welcoming?

You can be silent, people think you don't have anything to say when in reality, there's so many voices in your head, so many thoughts that's it's almost impossible to create words, your mind is occupied. You are silent.

Stop thinking of a reason as to why this is what you are. Because the more you think the less you feel, even thought that feels like the better option... to feel nothing... it's not. You won't feel happiness, you won't feel love. Go on. Distance yourself, but when everyone breaks away around you, you can only blame yourself. You don't need a reason to feel like this. It's just that time again, and it will happen again.

Sometimes you don't need someone to light up your world , you just need someone to sit in your darkness with you...

Atelphobia. The fear of not being good enough.

You are good enough.

You just don't know it yet.