Four

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It's almost midnight and I can't sleep. So, what do I do when I can't sleep? I FaceTime my best friend, of course.

I grab my phone and look up Macy's name and FaceTime her. It rings for a few seconds before I hear a groggy voice answer. The screen is dark so I know she's been asleep.

"Jade, I love you, but I love sleep more. You better be dead or drunk if you're calling me this late."

"Hello to you too, Macy." I say laughing. "I am neither of those things, I just wanted to talk. I can't sleep."

"Seriously, Jay." Macy says groaning.

Macy hates when I call her late at night. She values her sleep more than she values other humans. She may act like she hates me at the moment, but in reality, she lives for these late night gossip calls.

"Tell me about your date, please say it went better than mine." I say rolling over onto my back. I hear her huff through the darkness and I smile. There was a long silence, all you could hear was the faint hum of her fan in the background.

"Fine." She says as the screen lights up, indicating that she turned her lamp on. I smile giddily and I sit up in my bed. "The Sephora dude, Eric, was the perfect gentleman."

"Aw! So does that mean there might be a second date?" I ask, Macy holds up her hand, signifying that she isn't finished yet.

"When the waiter brought us the check, Eric wrote his number in it."

"Ouch, was she cute?"

"He was sexy as hell, but oh well, at least I got a free meal and some discounts." I wince and Angel just nods. "How did your date with Mr. Perfect go?" She grabs a bottle of water from her night stand and starts chugging it.

"It went fine, but turns out I was also on a date with Mr. Perfect's brother." Macy chokes on her water.

"Liam was there too?!" She all but yells. "Jade, what the hell?! How do you go from 'men ain't shit' to snagging the hottest fudging guys in school?"

I explain everything to Macy in detail. Her face lights up with a dumb grin every time I mention Liam's name. I roll my eyes at her, but she just ignores me.

"I mean obviously Nate is adorable and a gentleman, but Liam is that dangerously sexy one. I feel like Liam is the one for you."

"Neither of them is the one for me, because I'm staying single... for good. Men are sex-craved narcissistic assholes-"

"Who only objectify women and doesn't appreciate their worth." Macy finishes my sentence and I glare at her through the phone screen. "Can you please just shut the hell up with your anti-men rant and just listen to me?" I stare at her and wait patiently for her to reply.

Macy has heard all of my rants and speeches about how I hate guys. She has even asked me more than once if I was like Jeremiah and "batted for the same team." I'm not a lesbian, nor am I bi-sexual. There's nothing wrong with that, I just don't roll that way. Im strictly-dickly, but lately I've been wanting to chop those dickly's off.

"Eli is an immature little boy. He's in that goofy high school phase where he's still probably googling 'boobies' to fulfill his sexual desires." I cringe and Macy ignores me. "You've only had experience with boys, not with men. There is a significant difference between being a boy and being a man. You can't judge all of the male population based off of one bad experience with a boy. Go on another date with Nate. He definitely falls under the 'men' category. Learn how a woman should be treated and then come back and tell me if your rant still applies to the entire male species."

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