CHAPTER 1
ever since i was seven i've been cutting myself.
one time i just tried it, against my instincts.
from then on it served as an escape from my home life.
my mum died when i was six. that was when my dad turned to drugs and alchohol to try and drown his sorrows.
illegal drugs and poisionous liquids.
ever since i was seven i've been picking up the peices to my dad's disasters and trying to not let anyone find out what my life was like. if anybody found out i would be shipped away to child services for sure.
now at fifteen, i sit in the window seat at my trash ridden, broken down old house every day when i come home from school.
high school is my personal hell.
i don't know what i did to upset the devil but it seems like he's teamed up with luck and they're hell bent on destroying my life.
i don't get invited to parties.
i don't have a boyfriend.
god, i don't even have any friends.
everyday after school i get bashed by the bitch of the school; maya, her 'posse' and a group of 'popular' guys.
my dad neither sees or cares about my bruises.
he's usually unconcious or too drunk.
i hate him but he is the only family i have left so i've got nowhere else to go.
when ever i cut myself it's usually after my dad tells me how much of a disapointment i am or if he hasn't come home for over a week.
my life revolves around my wreck of a dad in my opinion.
my life is doomed in my opinion.
i usually skip school or stay at the back of the classroom, drawing.
to me there is no point in even trying because my dad is a full time job.
i was sitting in science because the stupid vice princable; mr samson had caught me just as i was walking out of the school gates.
of course, i wasn't listening to anything the teacher was saying.
even if i wanted to listen i couldn't hear it over emily, who was sitting infront of me, whispering about how i was a emo freak and i had no friends.
so because i had endured this every day since i could remember; i flipped my dark brown hair over my shoulder to hide my deep blue eyes and switched on my ipod; my one escape from this torture.
half of the class had passed when i suddenly felt my earphones ripped from my ears.
i looked around and found the culprit.
uh oh.
mrs. hughes, my science teacher.
"would you like to explain why you were not listening and wholeheartedly contributing to this lesson?" she asked.
if looks could kill...
"or better yet, you could explain to the princable why you were using a banned item during class."
isn't she used to it yet?
i thought
"im sure he would love to know." she said with an air of finality, and stuffed my book in my bag.
so forty minutes later, after suffering a lecture from mr. guller, the princable, i was free.
the first thing i did was get out of the school gates.
