Zombie survival book

Zombieland rules

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Columbus, the protagonist from Zombieland said that the main reason for his survival is that he followed a set of rules that he drew up himself to survive the zombie apocalypse. 32 rules were originally made and although not all of them are known, the rest of them are listed below.

Update: Official Rules (and their appropriate numbers) Here

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The Rules

1. Cardio

To escape a pursuing zombie you will need to out-run it, and this means being in good shape.

2. Double Tap

When in doubt, don't get stingy with your bullets.

Most zombies won't die from just one hit unless it's a shot to the head, and it will instead get up in very little time - and will then bite you. The most effective way to prevent this is to take a second shot/hit to their head which will stop them from attacking again, and surely one more shot can't do too much harm! For this to work, you will need at least two shots in your gun at all times so you can double tap without having to worry about reloading in time (you usually won't get that time). Luckily, the second shot should be easier as the first shot should take the zombie to the floor and temporarily prevent the zombie from moving

3. Beware of Bathrooms

You are at your most vulnerable while sitting on the toilet, so always take extra care.

Zombies seem to sneak up on people who are at their most vulnerable, although it probably just seems like this as zombies just attack with no special circumstances. However, this does not change the fact that toilets are places you want to be careful around - if you are caught with your trousers down then there's not much you can do about running away, so you better have brought a gun with you. The best way to stay safe is to check each bathroom before you enter, in every cubicle and every section as it isn't rare to find one just waiting there. Also remember that just because it's not socially acceptable to climb under cubical doors, it doesn't mean the zombies won't do it.

4. Buckle Up

You won't be driving along easy roads anymore: with numerous things to avoid you need to be ready for a crash!

The reason for seatbelts is fairly obvious as it pretty much carries over from the reason we are advised to wear them normally - being thrown at the windscreen doesn't usually end well. In Zombieland, however, you're much more likely to be flying through the windscreen as you try avoding escaping vehicles, dodging through abandoned cars or slamming on your brakes (or just driving faster) as a zombie steps in front of your car. For this reason, it's usually a good idea to stick on a seatbelt so you don't make the embarrassing mistake of dying from a cause other than zombie. However, some people argue that wearing a seatbelt is an inconvenience as it slows you down valuable seconds while trying to get out of the car which is being fast approached by zombies. It's also argued that crashing is a fairly ridiculous thing to worry about when the majority of people are trying to eat you. These doubts aside, it is usually safest to wear belts.

5. Travel Light

While trying to get away from a mass of zombies, the last thing you want is to be heaving luggage around.