Be Okay - Self Harm Levi x Reader (Modern AU) [Short Story]

Chapter 2 | Discovery

dis·cov·er·y
dəˈskəv(ə)rē/
noun
1.
the action or process of discovering or being discovered.

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Recap:

"Ah, I need to ask my neighbor if her son has some extra clothes so you can change into them. That uniform of yours must be a bit uncomfortable." You voiced, drying off the dishware before you put them all away.

"I'm fine. But if you do... get long sleeves and pants." He grumbled out, viciously scrubbing away at the marble.

"A-Ah, okay. But it's gonna get hotter..." You trailed off, walking towards your room to clean it up a bit.

"No objections. I want my arms and legs covered." He spoke, narrowed eyes turning to give you a dulled glare.

"Alright. Got it." You muttered out before giving the male a soft wave as you entered your bedroom to straighten it up a tad. As you cleaned with your earbuds in, you let your mind wander to possible conclusions for this little matter.

'He has no meat on his bones and gets extremely cold- yeah no, he's ten times stronger than I'll ever be...' You pondered, fixing the white sheets on your bed as you multitasked.
'He needs to be protected so he's using clothes for that... Yeah, probably a no too. Maybe he cuts? From what he's explained of his Titan-roaming world and how he's lost his comrades, he could honestly take it out on his wrists, thighs, and ankles to cope with stress...'

You glanced down quickly to your right ankle, still able to see the pink lines of stress that you had made into your own skin and thought if all of Levi's body was covered in them, and not just company scars. Pushing the thought away, you decided to confront him later when the two of you were more trusting of each other.

Hopefully, Levi was okay.

---

"-just put on the shirt and pants!"

"Never, woman!"

"Did you just call me a 'woman' as if I were some low life?"

"Shut up!"

"No! You live in my apartment, now tell me..."

Around a month had passed of random memories and funny moments. But as the weather began to change, you took notice again to Levi, who seemed to be pulling down his sleeves at every possible second, greatly concerning you. He would constantly fidget with his sleeves and yank them down past his thumb irritably, clicking his tongue quietly each time his sleeve tried to go up.

Having enough, you gently grabbed one of his hands and led the both of you into your room. You both hopped up onto the bed, you with your back facing the headboard and Levi sitting across from you, facing your direction.

"Levi... let me see your arms." You calmly pleaded, holding your own scarless ones out.

"Why do I need to?" He seethed out, sending a sharp glare your way, phazing you only slightly. After living with him for weeks, his aggravated personality was becoming pretty normal.

"Levi, please just-"

He placed his hands into your own, palms down as you gingerly flipped them over. Gently shrugging up his sleeve to his elbow, you could see angry red lines scratched over ones of pink and white. Scars.

You felt as the tears began to bubble up and roll down your cheeks as you tightened your grip on his hand slightly.

"L-Levi..." You choked out, at a loss of words.
"Why? I understand the war back where you're from, but why? Why are you so stupid as to continue? Why? Why are you doing this?"

He sat there in shock, heart throbbing in his ribcage as you lifted your (e/c) eyes up to meet his.

"M-my past... before the Survey Corps. It was horrible, (F/n)... ever since I was a child. Those memories come back to haunt me daily... I had no one to turn to for help." He cried out on his own accord, salty tears streaking lightly down his pale features.

Your eyes widened as he told you about his real backstory, the pain he had gone through in the Underground before his only two friends were lost at the hands of Titans on their first mission outside the walls after being captured. He told you his life story, sobbing along the way, breaking down.

"You see... I have nothing..."

"No." Levi's head snapped up to meet you.
"You have me. I'm here for you. And these scars," You lifted up his wrist to meet your mouth as you gave each wrist a delicate peck.
"These will never be made again, okay?"

Levi nodded his head, mop of ebony following in suit as he felt his heart flutter at your little shows of affection towards him.

"Sweetheart?" You called out, looking to the male. He nodded his head in response, afraid of how his words would betray him.
"I'm taking off your pants."

He had no time to react before the black sweatpants were ripped away from his legs, broadcasting the same scars that were loitered at the tops of his thighs.

You brought your lips down and pecked each leg before rising up and heading to your bathroom, returning moments later with a roll of gauze in your hands. Hopping back onto your bed, you began to wrap up his wounds, protecting him from infections before you laid down in the center of the bed, confusing Levi.

Parting your legs, you patted at the empty space between them as Levi began to comply, not forgetting to strip you of your sleeping shorts before he laid atop you, his arms wrapping gently around your waist, as to not irritate the self inflicted lines etched into his skin.

Burying his head atop your (size) chest, the two of you just laid there, not knowing what to do next.

"Levi... Please, I'm here for you. I love you too much to see you do this to yourself. Whatever you need, I'll be more than willing to do it." You voiced gently, beginning to run your fingers through his ebony tresses that were still neatly cut into a military style.

"T-Thank you... (F/n)." He panted out lightly as you soothed him into a calmer state of mind.

"You're welcome, Levi." You sighed out to the shorter male, enjoying how cuddly he was, even though it was after you had discovered those horrid lines. You had made a vow, as to never let him slice through his own skin again. For him to heal fully, and to never resort to cutting again.

"You're enough, okay? I need you to know that. Nothing bad will happen, and I'll always be here for you." You breathed out, letting yourself doze off as Levi had already fallen asleep.