infinite [ under construction ]

v. [original poem] time gone by

a poem

on love

and loss

and all the time gone by.

--

there was something about you, something different

I could not quite place my finger on

but you waltzed right into my life

and almost instantly my heart you won

I told you I was not worth it

I told you I was impossible to mend

but you took me by the hand

and promised to always defend

you loved me at my lowest

you adored me at my worst

you held me when my world collapsed

and my swollen heart threatened to burst

you never told me about your problem

you never were one to share

you always had such a professional poker face

whereas my heart on my sleeve I always wear

so love turned adoration turned infatuation

turned tolerance turned annoyance turned foolish hate

I left you in a whirlwind of bitter words

and now I wonder how cruel is Fate

because you needed me

you always did, it was true

but what I never admitted to myself until then

was that I needed you, too

my bruised pride ached in regret

and broken heart strings bled the blues

I harbored these awful feelings towards you

until I heard the news

I realize I failed you

I vanished, like a ghost

because I had gone and disappeared

just when you needed me most

I got there too late, found you asleep

or so I thought you were

the doctor told me what you had not

after that, it was all a blur

they wheeled you out in a covered sheet

and I swear my heart stopped with gloom

then the large swinging doors shut on you

and I screamed your name loud in the waiting room

I didn't go to your funeral

I mean, how could I

your last vision of me

were through tear-blurred eyes

I've been alright these past few years

been sort of hard in this economic recession

but if there is anything that reminds me of you

I have to take those pills for my depression

it's been seven years, three months, and two days

and I thought I would stop by before noon

but it's hard for me to be here, at your grave

I thought time healed all wounds

thinking back on all the great times we had

the ups and the downs and the in-betweens

all the signs of your secret were there

but I was too blind, it seems

you always cared about me

even when I didn't care about me

and you'd always be there for me

but I was gone when you needed me

and I'll never be able to forget you

I'll never be able to let you go

because everyday I swear I loved you

but just forgot to let it show

and if I end up dead tonight

where I'll end up is hell

because everyone knew I loved you

but it was you I had forgot to tell

so forgive me, my darling

my angel with her wings clipped

I never knew until your side of the bed ran cold

how much a poor man's world could flip

it's quiet now in the graveyard as I get up to leave

I think again of all the happy times and sigh

...but all that's left is your tombstone

...and all the time gone by.

---

hi

wow that was a tad (a lot) depressing wouldn't you say

just updating + writing sad poetry at twelve thirty-one in the morning

you know, the usual

so yeah, I wanted to write any sort of poem, any kind and this is what came out of me

I like it

idk bout you but I like it

so yeah

I'm so tired rn can you tell God bless America thank you for February break amirite or amirite

okay I may or may not go to sleep now idek I don't plan when I'm on vacation

hell who am I kidding I don't plan at all, for anything ever

I'm great at parties I promise

okay I'm shutting up now

who even reads this idek

okay bye now ILYSM night <3