I simply stood there, watching as she wept. My feet were nailed to the floor, held there by some invisible force. I was unable to move, to comfort her, to say it's going to be alright. Not that words could have formed with the lump constricting my throat. Not that I could have made my way to her, with the tears clouding my eyes. I was helpless, she was helpless, we were helpless. All around us the city burned and yet we could not move. Fear had come and passed yet the sadness, that heavy blanket of sorrow, it still remained.
The first explosions hadn't even been the worst of it. The people caught in the blast were the lucky ones, wiped out in a matter of moments. The others, caught in burning homes, suffocated by smoke and ash, they were still luckier than others. It was those who could do nothing but stand idly by, watching as their loved ones burned to death that I did not envy. I suppose I had been spared that part for I had been in my basement when the shockwave struck, bringing with it the fires of hell itself. I couldn't even find my family when I went searching. That may have been the most awful part. Trying to find those you cared about most. Trying and then failing. Just dust and ashes remained, not even a sole reminder of what had once been. A sharp crack split the air to my right, shattering my thoughts. I instinctively dove over Mia, sheltering her from the embers and splinters that scattered out from a falling beam. My vision all but disappeared as a cloud of thick ash was kicked up, creating an impenetrable void that threatened to devour all in its path. We weathered the storm, our breath held and eyes firmly shut, allowing the dust time to settle before even attempting the tiniest peek. It wasn't long before I released Mia from the bear hug I had enveloped her in, deeming it was once again relatively safe. But for how much longer? I wondered, fearing the rest of the walls would come crumbling down any minute.
"Come on," I whispered, afraid any loud noises could trigger an avalanche of wood and plaster. "We have to get out of here,"
"And go where?" Mia snapped, her voice like a dagger even at its low volume.
"Anywhere but here," I said, trying to keep my voice mellow.
"What good will that do? We will just get ourselves killed," she retorted, sending ash flying from her hair as she spun her head towards me. Icy blue eyes bore into me, as if the whole mess was my fault.
"And staying here won't do the same? There must be rescue crews out there and they won't find us if we just hide in this crumbling building. We have a better chance of survival if we start moving,"
For a time there was silence between us, the world around us eerily still. Car and house alarms no longer blared and explosions no longer rocked the ground beneath our feet. There were no more sounds to remind us that we were still standing in a city that had been thriving only a day before. I wondered if there was even anything left at ground zero, or just mounds of dust, occasionally tossed by the wind.
The wandering of my mind was ceased by a heavy sigh that erupted from Mia, sounding much more intense in the relative quiet. I hoped it had been a sigh of defeat, rather than frustration for we couldn't afford to argue. A bad feeling was growing in my gut, twisting and churning, telling me we had to go. I agreed with it whole-heartedly.
"Fine," Mia began, the sharpness gone from her voice. "I guess you are right, you are always right,"
I attempted a feeble grin as I held out my hand, offering to help her up. Mia tried to match my smile as she took my hand but all that resulted was a fresh stream of tears that drew lines in the dirt that covered her face. I quickly pulled Mia into an embrace, wrapping my arms around her trembling body, trying to squeeze out the fear and dismay that gripped her.
"We are going to make it," I whispered into her ear, my lips brushing against her hair. "We have to, for Mum and Dad,"
The brown strands of Mia's hair tickled my skin as she nodded, her body shuddering as she held back a sob. I held her tighter as more tears flowed, giving her time to regain control. A few moments later I released her, returning my arms to my sides.
"Alright," I said, my voice barely audible. "Time to go,"
My sister gave me a shallow nod, the tracks from her tears glistening as the moonlight passed across her face. Her deep blue eyes glimmered in the light but they lacked the fire they usually possessed. The hollowness tore at me, pulling at my heartstrings, silently asking why I could not rekindle their flames.
"Are we going to get moving?" Mia demanded, once again tearing me from my thinking, returning my mind to reality.
I simply nodded as I turned towards the front door of our home, or at least what was left of it. I wasn't sure why I felt like I had to use it, since there were many gaping holes in the walls around us. It just seemed right. Stepping through the threshold I received my first whiff of death and destruction. Out in the open the smell of scorched earth was thick in the air, nearly suffocatingly so. As difficult as it was to stomach, I wasn't about to let a smell hamper our survival.
Venturing out into the street was easier than I expected, aside from the horrific odour that hung in the air. The street was just as empty as it had been before, just grey cement with the husks of burned out cars parked at either side. All the houses were charred and crumbling, the supports weakened by the fires. Most were unrecognizable, their colours blackened by the flames and most of the structure collapsed. Seeing my home in such ruin made me feel like I was being crushed by a giant wave. It knocked the wind from my chest and drowned me in a sea of hopelessness. How did we even survive? I wondered as I gazed upon the gloomy street, illuminated by small fires dotting the many houses.
