A Life Wasted

Illinois Jail

The State Trooper was a man of honor and integrity. He made sure that my family was treated with respect and he ensured that no one messed with Mary. In short order Mary and our children were home. A few weeks later I received a letter from Mary in which she called me, "Her knight in shining armor." I am sure this was in references to making sure she didn't get in any trouble for being with me. I was pleased that my wife still viewed me as such, but it hurt to know how wrong she was. A real man would have never put his family in that position in the first place.

An odd thing went on in my mind after my arrest. It was something I still don't understand. Before my arrest I had given up on the whole abortion warrior thing, but as soon as I got over the shock of being thrown into a jail cell the idea came back to me with a vengeance. I became obsessed with abortion clinics and the idea that I was supposed to stop them. I've always been able to focus on what I was working on but I'd never known an obsession like this. The focus on this new obsession was the fact that I had failed. That I'd thrown away my life yet I hadn't managed to prevent a single abortion. Meaning, I hadn't managed to save a single babies life. I was so overwhelmed by this obsession that I couldn't think of anything other than getting back out to finish what I had started. I began planning my escape.

The state of Illinois never charged me with a crime. The state police delivered me to the nearest jail and the FBI immediately took over, charging me in federal court with interstate transportation of stolen property for the motor home and for being a convicted felon in possession of a firearm. At my federal bond hearing the United States Attorney argued that I was a flight risk because I was a licensed pilot. I thought he was making a joke, but no one laughed. Of course there was no bond, not that I could have afforded one. With my record of multiple escapes, it is no surprise that I was placed in a maximum security jail.

The minute they put me in the jail I began plotting my escape. It would not be a simple matter. The jail was seven years old and was built to federal standards to hold high-security federal prisoners. At first I couldn't figure a way out, but I believed it could be done. I knew I would find a way.

As every appointed lawyer seems to advise, my lawyer advised me to plead guilty to being a felon in possession of a firearm. It was never any doubt that I was a convicted felon, nor was there a question that I had been in possession of a firearm. The problem for me was that the federal law was so severe that even if I plead guilty the minimum sentence I could receive was 15 years. But even that wasn't possible as the best plea deal I was offered was 19 years. That seemed like an excessive amount of time to me for just having a gun in my possession so I refused to plead guilty. My lawyer accurately explained to me that there was no way to fight this case, but I wasn't going to give in so I told him to figure something out.

Though I wasn't charged with any anti-abortion activity, my lawyer knew all about it. He knew about my belief that God had called me to fight the abortion industry and in this he saw my only chance at winning my case. To this end he decided to attempt a defense of temporary insanity. I didn't like this idea because I didn't believe I was insane, temporarily or otherwise, but as he put it, "God told you to do something. In my book that's crazy." It was a good point so I agreed. When he filed the motion the Federal District Judge presiding over my case ordered me to receive a forensic psychiatric evaluation. A few months after my arrest I was transferred to a federal holding facility in Chicago where they tried to figure out if I had any loose screws. Turns out I did.