:: Chapter 16: Heartache ::

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James stealthily crept out of the guest room and sprinted to the seventh floor, his head reeling. A dozen emotions were threatening to explode and he needed a sanctuary fast. As the huge magical doors opened, James gladly entered the Room of Requirement and halted as he processed his surroundings. The room appeared more or less like it always had for him. There was a merry fireplace which was crackling in a corner and a huge mantle place. Fat sofas lined the room and there were lots of pretty lamps and an assortment of small brass instruments on various tables. The room was decorated in scarlet and gold, with a picture of the Gryffindor lion on one face of the wall.

The most important aspect of the room perhaps, were the numerous photographs which were on the mantle place. During James's seventh year he would always bring photographs and just stare at them for hours. These lone moments occurred when James was in desperate need of solace, when he needed a few hours alone to collect his thoughts. They only appeared however, when James was alone or if he was there with someone else.

James now walked upto the mantle place and grabbed a photo of Lily, where she looked up at him with a smile on her face as she played with a strand of her long, dark red hair. He smiled slightly at the photograph of his seventeen year old dead wife and he dropped into an overstuffed armchair, still staring at it.

"I wish you were here, you know." He began softly. "I wish you were here to see the brave young man our baby has grown up to become. You're not here now, but that won't stop me from talking to you...I know you're gone, Lily. I know that. And I'm not going insane over here. But do you think you can listen to me for a while? "

The Lily in the photograph just smiled at him.

"He looks just like me," He whispered, staring at the photo as though willing Lily to speak back. "But the most striking feature is his eyes, Lils, your eyes. Those bright emerald green orbs. I'm sure there is no brighter green anywhere else. . .

"He reminds me of you a lot, Lils. The way he speaks sometimes, the way he scrunches up his eyebrows when he's in deep thought, the kind and caring nature of his. It's all you. And I'm glad."

A huge tear rolled down his cheeks but he never noticed, his eyes were on the beautiful redhead who continued to smile widely at him, her green eyes sparkling. The light from the fireplace cast a faint glow on James's face as he continued to talk softly, his tone bittersweet.

"I was shocked when I saw him for the first time. I was invisible and I saw him walking with his friends. We could almost pass for twins, almost, but there are slight differences. And he has a big heart Lils, like you. He has two amazing best friends... Ron and Hermione. He's got his own Remus incarnate." He said with a small watery chuckle.

"Harry is also brilliant at flying. Made the team in his first year. If you were here, you'd be rolling your eyes at me, laughing as I talk about quidditch but I know you'd be cheering him on next to me. If you were here, how would it be? Would you feel what I'm feeling right now? I dunno why I'm back and you're not, Lils. I dunno why..." His voice shook as the tears fell endlessly, but he still payed no attention to it, it was so trivial...

"It hurts me to think that Harry doesn't remember you. He'll never know how much you had loved him. He doesn't remember how you used to sing to him every night, how you tickled him and laughed while I watched from a corner. How you couldn't bear to be separated from him for long. He'll - never remember." His voice cracked with emotion.

"I'll never get over your death, sweetheart. I've always loved you. I still do and I always shall. Never forget. I know you're always watching, always listening, and I probably look silly talking to your photograph, but it helps me, Lily. To just stare at you as I used to in Binn's class. Staring at you during his classes was the only thing that kept me sane, " He chuckled again.

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