Loving Olivia

Chapter 29 - The Decision

Olivia

I've never had a more difficult time getting out of bed in the morning. It was excruciatingly difficult. But walking into work was a million times worse.

All I can think about is him. His scent is all around me. I feel him all around me. It would be the best feeling in the world if I could enjoy it in my own little world. But I'm surrounded by a classroom of eight-year-olds, and it's just not the place to be thinking about him or last night.

I just can't help it. Even as I sit down at the back of the classroom for morning meeting I'm blushing. I partially blame the kid-sized chair, but I can't deny the slight ache between my legs. An immediate flashback of last night blazes through my brain. In particular one of Nico gripping my waist as he enters me.

I cover my face, trying to push the image aside. I brush back my hair, the room feeling like a hundred degrees, and I come across the same knots I wasn't able to tame in the morning, reminding me of my crazy sex hair. God, I'm a hot mess.

I'm reminded of that movie Unfaithful, when Diane Lane recalls her sexual encounter with Olivier Martinez on a train ride home. I remember watching it when I was younger and for some reason it always stayed with me through the years. The way she was practically squirming in her seat while having vivid flashbacks, a mixture of elation and guilt on her face.

I never thought that it would be possible to feel that way, but it's exactly how I feel right now. Only I didn't have a life-shattering affair. I just slept with my boyfriend, albeit for the first time. Which makes me feel even crazier because I'm having the same level of after-effects as she did. Don't get me wrong, I don't regret last night even for a second. It was the best night of my life. I only regret that I'm stuck here in this classroom right now, when I want to run straight back into my lover's arms.

I try to calm myself down and focus on whatever Mrs. Gutierrez is talking about. I really hope she hasn't noticed my erratic behavior. I wouldn't blame her if she thought I was on drugs. In a way, I guess I am. My dopamine levels must be soaring and plummeting like a rollercoaster on a never-ending loop.

When she pulls me aside after morning meeting is over, I'm half expecting her to hand me a letter of dismissal when she points to a piece of paper on her desk.

"This came in this morning," she says, and I'm instantly relieved when I see it's a progress report of the students.

It's broken down by subject, but my eyes instantly scan over towards the reading section since that's my area of focus with the kids. According to the report, on average the classroom's reading level has increased by half a grade in the last quarter. I blink several times just to make sure I'm seeing correctly, and my brain hasn't suddenly malfunctioned due to chemical imbalance.

Mrs. Gutierrez chuckles beside me and when I look up at her she has a wide smile on her face. "Why are you so surprised? You've been doing such a great job with them."

"I just can't believe it," I say, scanning the results of individual students by name. My heart swells when I stop at Abel's. He's the most improved of all of them.

"Believe it. The numbers don't lie. In fact, the principal wants to schedule a meeting with you next week to see if we could rotate you into different classrooms and discuss other ways to implement these learnings."

"Of course," I automatically reply, although my mind is still whirling.

"Great. I'll let her know. Congratulations, Olivia. Keep up the good work, you're really making a difference."

"Thank you," I say, my eyes glued to the report.

She chuckles again at my reaction. "Here, keep it," she says, handing it to me. "I'll ask for another copy."