Half a Heart | Niam Horayne |

| Chapter Four |

Last night was exhausting. That's good though, I needed sleep. After I awoke from inflicting wounds on my skin; about ten on each arm and then an uncountable amount on my stomach and thighs. I decided I was to re-dye my hair lilac, and some how dying it left it softer and it smells very fruity. What? I came out gay, my as well embrace it with open arms- Plus, fruit smells nice, aye? I love strawberries, they're the color of Liam's lips and oh my- Okay, I seriously need to get it through my head his undying hatred towards me. Well, that kind of hurts... Eh. I'm use to pain. Oh, that sounds depressing. Well, I'm a depressing person, not like you care though; nobody cares.

Oh yeah! Parker invited me to a party.

Well, it's probably a, "One more week 'til Christmas break, so let's get drunk and do stupid shit!" Well, I don't plan on getting drunk, and I don't even know who's party this is. Oh, I bet him and Zayn are gonna get naughty. Tsk, tsk, tsk. Teens are so hormonal and sex-driven. Oh, nasty. Well, I can't really say that,... I'm a teen too, but, you get my point. I decided since, it is almost Christmas; and I have a lot of sweaters, that I'm going to wear me red sweater that fits onto my skin and has little white reindeer designs almost across my chest along with diamond shaped designs below and above the reindeer. I put a white long sleeve polo beneath it beforehand, oh my I look very nerdy. Like, basically the definition of nerdy, oh my. Did I mention yesterday, I managed to break my glasses in half? So then I had to duck tap them? Oh well, I did. So now I definitely look like a nerd; Josh is definitely going to use this against me today. "Oh Niall, you look like a fucked up little bitch today, don't ya?" Oh goodness.

I also slipped on a dark pair of skinny jeans and some fuzzy green and red striped socks with snowmen on them- You had to know. I then pulled on dark brown combat boots that go just above my ankle and have a grayish-brown fuzzy lining from the inside being fuzzy as well. What? You have to walk on your feet all day when you go to school; so don't even judge me about my fuzzy foot needs. The plus side, is my mom is home! She's giving me a ride to school, in fact I hear her now. "Niall, baby, time to go to school!" Aw, I love her so much. I'm sorry she's basically one of few friends I have. I could probably tell her anything besides the fact I'm bullied and hurt myself in so many ways possible. Yeah; I cut myself; which you already knew but I also burn myself. I prefer cutting though, I like seeing the blood come out, so I can see the outcomes of the pain I put my through; it's almost like I'm bleeding my emotions out.

I ran downstairs, almost falling because I'm Niall Horan, and I am very clumsy. "Oh Niall baby- Niall? Where'd you get that black eye?" She asked, oh no not this. "I was in gym and I didn't see the ball coming my way and it hit my eye," I lied. She nodded before giving me a quick kiss on the eye and ushering me to open the front door; I opened it quickly, it was a little tough considering it was frozen a little since it snowed even more; but I managed. I took a step outside and I walked down the steps; and since I didn't fall before I guess nature took this as a chance to fall now, and I slipped right on my face. Luckily my mum caught me before I made contact with the ground. "Nialler, you're going to hurt yourself!" She exclaimed and I blushed. "I'm sorry mum, I'll make sure to watch my step next time," I apologized sheepishly. Or maybe next time I'll snap my neck and I won't have to be such a hassle anymore.

We entered the car and turned on the radio. We made small talk on the ride there bust soon enough we made it to Hell; I mean school. "Love you sweetcheeks, see you later," She smiled. "Uh, wait actually, mum? I was wondering if I could go to a p-party with Parker...," I asked hopefully. She smiled brightly. "Sure! Just make sure no drinking or doing any drugs, and if you're going to do something just know that boys can give other boys STD's and I don't want my little Nialler to get sick, 'cause once those things happen down there, there is no getting rid of 'em. Seriously Niall, one day it's critter-free, and the next it's full of-" My eyes widened. "Mum! I love you, but that's enough. I-I'm going to go, love you; again," I said and she smiled and nodded as I made my way out of the car, and started walking up towards the school.