The Rape of Proserpine

The Rape of Proserpine Chapter Thirteen

The Rape of Proserpine

Thirteen

I did not fear death, for when Marel disappeared, I went with him. No, death wasn’t my greatest fear. All the memories I kept inside my head of Marel, one by one, like dominos, being taken away from me: that, and the gnawing probability that it would happen, was slow, painful death in itself. I could not bear to think that one day, I would wake up and look at myself in the mirror and realize that once upon a time, I had a brother who looked just like me… and then nothing.

“What do you want to become when you grow up?” I had asked Marel on the bus, we were kids then, so young and reckless, with no cares about the world.

“A doctor,” he had said simply. “What about you Darrel?”

I pretended to think hard. I even put my thumb and index finger together to rub at my chin. Giving him a serious expression, I answered. “I want to become a porn star.”

It was the first time in years since when we were toddlers that he pinched both my cheeks so hard that I nearly screamed and cried. Later, at home, I kicked his butt.

“Marel,” I whispered to myself, my voice drowned out by the hammering rain. “I’m so sorry.” I ran, splashing puddles of water and mud all over my body. I felt cold, frozen from the inside out. The trail was slippery, my wet feet already getting squishy inside my shoes. I’ve stumbled a few times, but went on without as much as a groan. The clearing was right in the middle of the forest, the pine tree towering like a church spire. I ran, feeling invincible.

“I don’t like River.”

“Well, I don’t like Kenon.”

Marel and I were lying on our backs on the roof, watching the sky turn from a deep blue to purple. He sighed miserably beside me, thinking of a way to make me change my mind about River and Kenon.

“I don’t think River’s a bad guy… but he could be.” I stood up immediately, nearly falling over, and left him alone without a word.

The harsh rain blurred my vision. Small, sharp twigs sticking out here and there scraped at my naked arms and face, but I didn’t mind. They meant nothing to me, while my brother… he meant the world.

"Happy Birthday!" Both of us greeted at the same time, making our parents and us laugh so hard.

“I got you a present.” Marel threw a medium sized box wrapped in fancy blue paper at me. I caught it with both hands and grinned widely.

“Is this what I think it is?”

He shrugged; the twinkle in his eyes and the stupid smile plastered on his face betraying him. “Open it.”

Five seconds later, we were drinking orange juice using identical coffee mugs. The bastard knew I was giving him a mug with a picture of himself, so he got me the same exact one, only the face on the picture had a different eye color. My eye color. Best birthday present I ever had.

A sob escaped my lips while tears I had saved up for more than a year spilled out of my eyes, mingling with the rain running on my cheeks. In the end, Marel had successfully made me cry, only with his memories flashing before my eyes. Our memories together. Memories of us I desperately cling to and replay every night before I close my eyes to sleep.

My knees suddenly buckled, making me drop down to the dirt. I screamed, tearing my lungs apart.

“Break up with Colleen, Marel. She’s a whore, and you know it.”