"That's not an idea that's called rape"
"No, no! I mean he fucks you because #philtops2k16"
"Are you saying I bottom?"
"I mean I'm not saying that you're not"
"So you're idea is I seduce him, get him to fuck me, and then love will bloom?"
"Sounds weird and creepy af. Scratch that idea coz there will be no smut in this fic anyway"
"That's too bad"
"Sorry, man. I just don't do smut"
After their meaningful conversation, Phil waved and shouted to ask if they were done. They nodded and walked back to where he was standing.
"You guys okay?" he asked.
Dan and God nodded simultaneously. Totally not suspicious. "Anyways!" God suddenly said, clapping her hands together. "Shall we continue the tour?"
"Yeah sure!" Phil answered.
"So after all these cute coffee shops, you will find the movie theatre where you can kiss in the dark and not be caught"
"God" Dan hissed, "Please no"
"Sorry. Anyways, continuing the tour! Actually, who gives two shits let's just go to my house"
While walking to their house, Phil felt...what was it? Jealousy? Pshhhh nah.
(If you get that reference thank you I love you)
Did God really think of Dan as a son? What if.... What if he was something else to her?
"Alright snap out of your day dream, Philly" God said when she saw that he wasn't paying attention. She opened the door to her house that Phil hadn't realized they reached. It was a one floor house because, as God was just telling them, she hated stairs. "Effort!" she sighed as she described her hatred for them. ((Seriously though)) It was small and cosy and warm and beautiful and it had the best wifi in all of heaven, earth and hell. Magical.
"Wow! You live here?" Phil asked.
"I practically never leave"
Inside there were five rooms (not including the bathroom): the bedroom that really was the only important room, a living room with a couch with potato patterns so that God could call herself a couch potato, the amazing kitchen, a private movie theatre and the best thing ever aka a library.
"This is great" Phil exclaimed. Dan nodded and on purposely put his arm on Phil's, to which Phil blushed and looked away. It was probably just a friendly thing right? Dan probably didn't even mean it. Right?
Seeing Phil's reaction gave Dan hope that maybe he liked him and he casually said, "Phil you know what?"
"What?"
"You're a great friend. I really like you"
Stress on the word friend.
Phil, noticing the stress on the word friend, nervously laughed and said, "Oh well I like you too, Dan. Thank you"
"Well, Phil, what if I told you I liked you not in a friend way?"
"What?"
YOU ARE READING
Hella Hot
FanfictionPhil Lester is dead. Wait, what? No, this isn't a story of how Phil tragically dies and Dan's all sad. This is the story of how Phil fell in love with his Grim Reaper. By that I mean: Dan is Phil's Grim Reaper, and he's leading him to heaven. •••...
