324- Chapter Four

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(A/N: This chapter is dedicated to a new fan, KoolKicks. All comments are appreciated even if I don't reply to them, I'll answer questions if you have them. And if it's really good, votes are awesome! So, I'll give dedications if you comment first/ask/give me a good review. Hope you enjoy, I've planned big for this story.)

"Acute lymphoblastic leukemia," James said with a blank expression. He sat there, a thin blanket thrown over his legs and his hands held lightly together on his lap. We both stared at a fixed point for a moment, not a single word spoken. Then he broke the silence with, "Nine years old and I was diagnosed. That's why I left school, my parents thought it would be easier and better for me to be homeschooled."

"They were probably right," I finally said. Then I cleared my throat. "Um. So... Why were you at the mall?"

"I was in remission... Everyone figured I was fine to go."

"Remission?" I asked, though I knew it should have been obvious.

"I was feeling better, I didn't feel the symptoms and when the doctors did tests, they couldn't find the cancer cells. But they were only dormant, or they came back or something..."

"Oh."

He met my gaze with a hurt look in his eyes. Not from pain, but my lack of talking.

"Sorry it's just a little surprising. You seemed so..."

"Not dying?"

"Oh you're not dying, James," I told him quickly. "Leukemia is curable, right?"

He nodded reluctantly. "Yes, but it's still the same idea-"

"Dying wasn't the word I was looking for. I just didn't expect something so serious."

"Are you going to leave now? Because it's too serious. Another one..." He trailed off, his gaze averted. "Another one gone..."

"No!" He looked back up. I could tell he was fighting himself, trying to keep the hopeful gleam out of his eyes. "I didn't say that."

"I guess you didn't. What are you thinking right now?"

"Honestly, I can't tell. It alternates between nothing and everything." He nodded in an understanding way. "Can... Can you tell me some things?"

"Of course."

"How did you know?"

"It happened pretty quickly when I got home and started throwing up... There was blood. I was sore everywhere. I couldn't stand. Straight to the hospital."

He said these things in almost a casual way, like they weren't anything abnormal. Like they weren't bad. I had to imagine what it was like, either the years of this had desensitised him, or he was screaming inside. On some level I myself was screaming inside, surely he couldn't be oblivious to that. It happened to him again, after the hollow promise of wellness. Shouldn't there be anger in his eyes, sadness, annoyance? Anything but the soft look he was giving me, apparently hoping I wouldn't run away because of this. Shouldn't he be worried about himself?

"W-Wow..." I stuttered after a short pause. "How long were you in remission?"

Not only for the sake of my curiousity, I had asked so that it filled the silence and he didn't think I was just waiting for my chance to escape. He seemed to take the question as a good thing, and sat up a little straighter.

"A few months," James told me. "I was hoping I'd just get past whatever was bugging me the last couple days. It got the worst three days ago."

"I could tell you were serious about not feeling well," He flinched at that word again. Serious. "W... Why do you do that?"

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