What The People Don't See

Everything Is Embarrassing

My camera's flash was refusing to cooperate. I fumbled with the switch, trying to slide the stupid piece of shit into place above the lense. I cursed loudly as it dropped to the floor, the loud thump being absorbed by the screeching of Josh's guitar. It looked like I wasn't the only one having a tad bit of trouble. He was flailing his arms around like a windmill as he tried to get the attention of the sound engineers up in the box. I smirked at him as I scooped up the flash and shoved it hastily on to my camera. My hands were slick with sweat. It was ridiculous. I felt like I was the one about to go on stage.

I jumped at the sound of abrupt giggling from behind me. Cal and Adam were sitting on a couch backstage, so close they were practically laughing into eachother's mouths. Adam was squished up against one of the armrests, Cal's right leg swung over Adam's left. There was enough room to fit five more people on the bloody couch with the way they were sitting on top of one another. They looked like one of those vomit-worthy Instagram couples. Cal suddenly glanced in my direction and I hastily looked away, pretending that I was scrolling through my camera's gallery instead.

We had eventually been kicked out of Nando's. Apparently, we were loud and disruptive, and they were under the impression that Eloise was 'highly intoxicated'. She just gets excited when there's drama unfolding in front of her. Especially if it involves her nearest and dearest. To be honest, I think she was highly dissappointed with my reaction. Maybe she'd been expecting me to throw a tantrum or fling a few glasses in Adam's general direction. And if they accidently hit Calum, well, what can you do?

"Okay," was all I said, and I took a few sips from my Coke and awaited the outburst that was sure to come from El. I didn't have to wait long. The conundrum that followed resulted in us being kicked out the doors and told to never bother coming back again. We began to traipse back towards the venue, my mind a muddled mess of confusion. I wasn't against Cal and Adam being together but it did make me slightly uncomfortable. It was my best friend and my ex, for Christ's sake! Of course, it was weird. I also couldn't understand how I hadn't noticed it before. Calum definitely wasn't gay but was he bi? Pan? I'd never heard him say anything even close to being attracted to guys before. Maybe it was just Adam, maybe he was Adamsexual.

I snorted at the thought, shattering the peaceful silence that had lulled us into a false sense of security. Adam and Cal looked terrified of me, El looked excited, waiting for me to bust some sort of fuse.

Adam, on the other hand, wasn't so difficult to figure out. I thought back to all the times I'd introduced him to different girls, hoping that he'd stop being a grumpy git if he had a girlfriend. He hardly even batted and eye lid at any of the girls, saying that he didn't have time for anyone. I felt a pang of guilt as I glanced back at my best friend, wondering if he hadn't trusted me enough to tell me. If I hadn't been a good enough friend.

Something else was bothering me. The not so little, blaringly obvious fact that Adam had never been a big fan of Cal. He literally threw a tantrum when I told him that we were going out, warning me that he was "bad news" and would probably end up hurting me. Whenever we all hung out together, he always did his best to avoid Cal, standing at the opposite end of the room at house parties, even making sure to sit a couple feet away from him whenever Cal forced him to play COD with him. One time, when we went camping, and El suggested that the girls take one tent and the boys take the other, he freaked. He was so against the idea that he was almost in tears, begging me to let him sleep with me instead of...oh. Oh. Oh my God! It all makes sense now.

I whipped around, stopping right in the middle of the pavement to the protests of passer-by's surrounding us. I ignored the grunts and the complaints, only having eyes for the boys standing in front of me.