Formaldehyde

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The smell of formaldehyde isn't necessarily a pleasant one but it's better than the smell of charring flesh.  Formaldehyde is a hunger stimulate, the smell so strongly associated with death sending you towards the fuel that keeps you living.  Charred flesh clings to your nose and won't let go, smothering you in the idea of death.

"I'm charred flesh and their formaldehyde," Larkin thought as the presentor pulled out preserved organs to show them what would be stolen from them in just 365 short days.

"Those of you who are luckily will have a cian with a strong heart," the presentor explained, "the kidneys or some non vital organ will go first and you will have an extended sustainment process to enjoy."

Kids all around the room began to squirm, the weak ones wiping tears.  They would face reprecussions, it was a plebs highest honor to participate in the sustainment process with their cian.  Their tears would be seen as treason.  Larkin didn't fear their punishments she would be dead in a year and they would never risk injuring her organs, yet she couldn't find a tear to cry.

The presentor continued on, discussing the process until the word sustainment was a jumble of meaningless syllables that rattled in Larkin's mind.  When he announced that his speech had concluded and packed up the formaldehyde soaked baby organs the plebs returned to normal.  If being a pleb showed anything it was that even with a death date around the corner it is hard to comprehend ones own mortality.  Their disbelief disgusted Larkin but nothing sickened her as much as the fact that she was willing to go along with their act.

"Lark!" Sanders called.

She pivoted on the spot smiling widley.  "Hey charred flesh," she said.

He grimaced, not everyone dealt with their mortality quite as insensitivley as Larkin.  "He still has 365 days before the barbeque Lark, don't scare the boy." Briar said joining them with a laugh.

"You two are twisted," Sanders said running a hand through his ruddy brown hair in obvious discomfort.

"We prefer sadistic," Briar said.

"Come on Sanders, relax, I mean you're not afraid of fire are you?" Larkin said with a grin that matched Briar's.

"Why am I even friends with you two?" Sanders said lightly brushing his shoulder against Larkin's to show that it was a joke.

"Woah," Wilder said finally finding his way across the auditorium to join them, "since when is Sanders our friend?"

The girls laughed and Sanders shoved Wilder gently.  "What took you so long Wild you're like seven feet tall, you can't make your way through a crowd?"

"I'm six-eight" Wilder corrected noticiably offended.

"Boys are so emotional," Briar laughed and both boys just shrugged.

The group began to head off to their respective jobs with the boys going one way and the girls the other.  Larkin had work on the cleanup crew and Briar had a fence to build around the dump while the boys had gotten lucky and had transport jobs on the route to cian city this month.

Larkin was only about two minutes late which was basically early for her.  There was no one to watch over their work since no cian wanted the job and no pleb was allowed to be of more importance than any other, still not one worker strayed from their task, whether their complinance was due to fear or apathy no one knows.  For the remainder of daylight Lark heard the rhythmic scraping of the shovel against the ground intermixed with the thud of the trash landing in the barrel.   The land had been a dumping ground for trash before the law was changed to have all trash put through the recycler.   Cleaning it was commonly thought of as the worst job to spend a monthly rotation doing but Larkin didn't really mind it since therewere always interesting gadgets among the garbage.  She was almost sad her month was nearly over, she hated job changes.

After five hours of work the blistering sun began to set, it was on hot days like these that all of the 15s were glad to have preparement in the morning to cut the work day short.  Lark ran to meet up with her friends in the dining commons but by the time they sat down to their mashies they were all too tired and hungry to do anything but grunt their aknowledgement of each other's prescence.

Lark's bed was calling to her so she and Briar hurried to their room.  Showers were only premitted once a week and Larkin wasn't scheduled until the day of Thurs so she made due went the little sink in her room and then collapsed into her straw mattress.  Just when she was seconds feom driffting off Briar loudly cleared her throat.  Larkin sighed, "yes Briar?"

"This whole preparement thing can really mess with someone's head huh?" She tried unsuccessfully to keep her tone light.

Lark resigned herself to the fact that it would be a long conversation and turned to face the other girl in the dark.  "Yeah I guess so," she didn't have the energy to do much of the talking.

"I mean the sustainment won't be so bad because we'll get to be leisurely and stuff but the preparement just sucks." Briar fumbled with her words and Larkin felt her discomfort since the girls, like all plebs, rarely touched on the subject of sustainment in a serious way.

"Yeah, I'd rather just get to than do all this waiting," Larkin agreed not realizing how much the waiting had been draining her until she said it.

The other girl nodded in the dark, "waiting was fine when we could forget about it but now we are reminded every morning. "  Briar complained and Larkin nodded not wanting to say anything more on the subject.

There was a long, pregnant pause.  "What do you think it's like... after the sustainment?" Briar finally said ashamed to have asked the minute it left her mouth, no one talked about the time after the sustainment.

"Its probably just nothing," Lark provided a generic answer she had heard mumbled amongst older plebs when she was a kid.  It wasn't until after she spoke that she began to actually let herself wonder.   "I can't imagine not thinking," she mumbled aloud, more to herself than to Briar.

"I hope its more than nothing," Briar said.

Lark didn't dare say it aloud but her thoughts screamed, "please just let it be nothing, just let it be an end."

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