Wonders of a Smile

Sober

Declan

Declan set down a glass of water and aspirin by his mother’s bed, making sure to not disturb her slumber. He knew she was going to have a hangover and he hated how he couldn’t be there to help her, but he had to go to school. He placed a careful kiss to her head, wincing at the smell of whiskey that attacked his nose. He then stepped out of his mom’s room and sighed as he put his backpack on and grabbed his sports bag.

As Declan strolled down the pavement towards his school, he couldn’t help but reminisce the times when his mother was actually sober. She was actually a decent mom-- painstakingly naggy with best intentions and all. He sure missed those times when he could actually come home and expect to see his mom at home waiting for him, sober and with her heart intact. But then again, not everyone got what they wanted. Life wouldn’t be the same if it was like that. Declan scoffed at himself. Who was he to talk about life like that? What was life anyways? Was it a journey or was it a destination? Maybe it was just the universe’s sick, sadistic way of punishing him for something he did in a previous life? His former self must have done something terribly awful because his life was—for the lack of a better word—shit. Complete and utter shit.  Declan’s life wasn’t the same and he knew that it never would be. It could never go back to that go-happy way no matter how much he wanted it to be. He was…stuck. Stuck here, making sure his mother didn’t get herself killed with her recently acquired habits. Stuck here, having to wait for his drunk, dead beat mom to come home from the bar and getting her an aspirin every morning. But what choice did he have? He couldn’t leave her like that, he just couldn’t. Yup, shit described his life quite perfectly.

HOOONNK!

Declan jumped and felt his heart against his chest, his anxiety peaked. His uninjured hand instinctively went to the orange contained in his pocket as he turned to see who had honked at him. Saying he was surprised to have seen Elise pulling up in her car was an understatement. His house wasn’t exactly on the way to school.

“Hey, need a ride today?” Elise asked, sounding too happy this early in the morning.

Declan tried to act like he wasn’t still shaken up and nodded quietly. He got into Elise’s car and slammed the door shut right before Elise sped off towards school. Declan made sure to cover his hands with his backpack so Elise couldn’t see that they were shaking uncontrollably. The scenery passed by in a blur as both Declan and Elise sat in silence with the radio playing softly in the background, but either of them was too caught up in their own thoughts to really pay attention.

“So…” Elise started, but trailed off at the sight of Declan jumping at the sound of her voice. “…You okay, Declan?”

Declan took a deep, shaky breath before turning to Elise with a forced grin. “Perfect.”

Elise nodded, unconvinced, but didn’t push any further. When they had finally arrived at school, Declan jumped out of the car and slammed the door shut before walking towards school, not even bothering to wait for Elise. He was too keyed up to stay still. Elise struggled to catch up to him, but when she did, she called out his name.

“Declan,” she said, breathlessly.

Declan once again, jumped and clenched his bottle in his jacket pocket as if it were his only life line.

Elise stopped to stare at him, causing a strange feeling to stir in his chest, but he ignored it. ‘What was she looking for?’ Declan couldn’t help but wonder. Her eyes probed his face, making Declan feel quite uncomfortable. He felt as if she could see right through him and it was unnerving to him. Her light brown eyes eventually broke away from his face as she looked down.

Declan shrugged it off and looked forward as he walked to his class. He nearly jumped out of his own skin as he felt a small hand suddenly grasp his. He looked to his left to see that Elise was cradling his hand with both of hers. Her head suddenly flashed up, the concern and shock evident in her eyes.

“What happened to your hand?” she gasped out.

Declan gulped and peeled his hand out of her careful grasp. Having contact with her was making him feel strange. “It’s nothing, Elise.”

But before he could cease all contact, Elise’s hands tightened, but not enough to hurt him. “No, that’s not nothing, Declan. Tell me.”

“Uhh…umm…” Declan failed to conjure up coherent thought because all he could focus on was Elise’s thumb rubbing soothing circles over the palm of his hand. “I-uhh, tripped and fell on it.”

Elise gave him a deadpanned look and huffed out, “Really?”

Declan cleared his throat, “Yeah.”

“Wow, you’re pretty clumsy then.”

Declan was surprised that Elise had believed his lie so easily, but didn’t say anything. He forced a chuckle. “Yeah, haha…”

Elise

Liar, Elise couldn’t help but think. What kind of crappy lie was that? Did he really think that Elise would believe such a terrible lie? Declan was the most coordinated person she had ever met, hence his number one spot on the tennis team. So how could Declan Cast trip and fall on his own hand like that? She was torn between being annoyed and hurt. Annoyed that he could think she was dumb enough to believe him. Hurt that he didn’t even trust her enough to tell her the truth. But she couldn’t push him… She had to wait for him to come to her. Declan Cast had a past and from the looks of it, a pretty dark one at that.

Elise was just going to have to wait for him to finally trust her enough to let her in because…he was worth it. He was a boy who had been through something, something that she couldn’t even begin to imagine because Elise was lucky. She was lucky enough to have such loving parents. She had hit the jackpot when it came to families…and it wasn’t fair. 

“So how was your weekend?” she asked softly.

“Good,” he replied with slight irritation in his voice.

Elise sighed inwardly. It looked like they were back to square one with curt responses and the indifferent attitude.

“That’s good,” she said with a sad sigh as she peered up at him, hoping to find that glimpse of life in his chocolate eyes, but all she could see was darkness.  

Elise couldn’t help but feel a little disappointed in not just herself, but Declan as well. They were actually moving forward. They were beginning to become friends, but then something happened to him, again, bringing him five steps backwards. She checked off another symptom off her mental list of PTSD effects. Jumpy? Check. Irritable? Check. It seemed like she was going to have to start all over, again. But this time, she was going to be more careful, better. This time, she knew that there was something hiding behind that wonderful smile of his and she was determined to find out what it was. 

A/N: Sorry I haven't posted in forever. School...is...well...a damn bitch.