Fitting In Is A Trend

Do not call me Charlotte.

"June 12,2013

...I am so confused. Ever since my father died everything changed. My grades, my mother's behavior, my old "friends", and me. I have so many things to share. So many secrets people trust me with. I promised myself I'd never tell a living soul. You're not necessarily living or a soul so I guess you will have to do.Who am I, why am I so special anyway?Why do they trust me? I ask that question so many times I forget its meaning ..."

Ugh, I'm writing in this thing again!

I close my leather diary and throw the pen. I am too fucking big to be writing in this. I'm a junoir for crying out loud!

I threw my diary on my cluttered floor, or at least what used to be a floor. I picked up my forest green van shoes and slipped them on. I glanced at the clock " 7;30 AM."

I really need to do my laundry. I got up from my desk and started for the bathroom.

I looked into the mirror covered with stains. My brown eyes looked tired, my red hair was a mess, I looked dead like. Before I started obsessing over my face my mother shattered my thoughts.

"Charlotte, get up!" she yelled from outside my bedroom. I could already tell she was having a hangover.

Nothing new. Not even on a Thursday morning.

"I'm up, and the names Charlie! " I sang walking out the room.

"That's not what your birth certificate says!" she hollered from the door of my room.

"How many times do I have to tell you, I don't care about a certificate!"

"You know what, I don't care anymore!" I heard her tripping over beer cans, bottles, and clothes walking towards me. "When you get home from school, clean this room, this is a fucking disgrace!" she hissed.

It surprised me she used the word clean and the fact that she wanted me to do that to my room. My room was the cleanest one in the whole house. Well, there's only 2 rooms bedroom wise but mine's still the cleanest!

I ignored her and searched for my bag. I haven't been going to my new school lately, so I haven't used it in days.Walking around the city is what I enjoyed most, I hated my school anyways. All there was were beautiful girls that went perfectly with the handsome boys. Everyone was popular and if they weren't they looked up to the popular. It was like in Mean Girls. They looked up to the girls who wore pink on Wednesday. Gee, I haven't watched that movie in years.

"Charlotte! What are you doing, you still have to go to school you smart a$$! " my mom yakked.

The fact that she called me names doesn't bother me at all. I like my mom when she's drunk actually. While she's sober, she's such a witch. Ever since my father died she started drinking heavily and cursing more and getting physical with people... That's actually why we had to move from New York to California. It wasn't a big deal to me. I had no friends back at home either, but there sure were people I could relate to there. Here, you have to either be pretty or rich to fit in. And I'm neither

I finally found my bag, picked it up, brushed it off, put it on and headed for the door.

"Mom I'm out" I sang.

" You better take your a$$ to school and only to school! No more skipping!" she shot.

~
~
~
~
~
~
~

The late bell rang and I am late once again.

Just as my math teacher Mr.Angus was about to close his nicely polished wooden door, I barged in dropping my textbooks in the process.