(I was informed by one of my comments that the song i wrote the lyrics down to in one of my rants are pretty dirty. I agree and i don't advise listening to the song on the sidebar UNLESS you are already an Asking Alexandria fan. I am also dedicating my last chapter to Nadie_Rae because she is the one who inspired me to rant)
38. Act your age! Okay, your character is like thirteen right? Mhmm yeah and she is draped over this guy who is like seven years older than her? Oh, okay now I understand your story is about a girl who still plays with Barbies and believes in the tooth fairy who decided to act out the last music video she saw right? Oh no, it’s about overcoming her fear of love? Well she sure is overcoming something. Come on man! She is thirteen and the guy is old enough to be her young uncle. You may say that she is taking over what she wants but what she wants just so happens to be illegal in most countries! And what is she wearing?! A dress small enough to be a wristband! Who are her parents? I have never, ever met parents who allow their thirteen year old daughter to do to that. I’m thirteen and I couldn’t get a Facebook or technically watch PG-13 movies until my 13th birthday. I know, I know those are just some first world problems.
39. Authors notes in the middle of the story. I could be really getting into the story; so much that I am ignoring the outside world basically. Then right in the middle of the paragraph I see “Zomg! I was totallyyyyy gonna stop here but I decided not to so ENJOY” or “whoa what do you think is going to happen next???? Keep reading and you’re gonna like see it :)))” That just yanks me out of the story. If you were going to stop but continued the story you don’t have to remind me the exact place you planned on cutting the chapter. You could just leave it at the end of the chapter in a little footnote. That is just really aggravating. Also in your little reminders you seem excited to just ruin my experience of reading the story.
40. Mentioning random celebrities in your story. “That guy over there was just too cute. He had dirty blonde hair and he seemed pretty fit. He totally reminded me of Garret Ecstasy!” That is an example of mentioning a random celebrity in your story. I doubt the millions of wattpaders on this site know exactly who Garret Ecstasy. If he was a character in your story, I would understand because that is a big part of your story. But if you’re just mentioning him and he has nothing to do with your story then you aren’t helping me enjoy the story. And for those of you reading this thinking ‘Who the heck is Garret Ecstasy dangflabbit!’ he used to be in the band Blood on The Dancefloor. So if you are mentioning random people in your stories well “you dun’ goofed!” Sorry, Blood on the Dancefloor reference.
41. When authors get mad when someone leaves a comment giving you advice on your grammar mistakes. “Oh my god! Y r u ppl being mean to meeee?! I am only humanee!!! $0 wh@t if the storii h@d speeling mestaks! I useed txt t@lk cuz th@t h0w we @ll commmunicayt now rite?!?!? lyke wat is wong wit dat?” Your readers are there to support you and help you. Don’t get all pissy because the fans have trouble reading because of all the spelling and grammatical errors in your story. Truthfully, when people comment on my stories about any errors I fix them for that chapter or any chapters that had received that comment and I write them down so I know what I have to fix for all the future chapters.
42. Giving unreasonable demands in order to post another chapter. “Okay in order for me to publish another one of my awesome chapters, I will need 250 more votes and 300 more fans (: kthxbai!” That is very annoying to see because basically you are saying that you are no longer writing and only a wattpad wish on a star could help. If you do make it to the ridicules amount you then get up and leave Wattpad in shame because you know you just gave us that amount to prove to random people on the internet that you are popular.
