Faded Perfection (Beautifully Flawed, #2) - SAMPLE

Chapter 5

I cracked my aching eyes open, blinking them as if it would help the dryness that set in when all the tears were spent. I cried myself to sleep in Adam's arms after seeing Tara. I looked up at the ceiling before rolling over to find the space beside me empty.

"Adam?" I asked as I sat up, cursing as pressure pushed hard against my temples. I squeezed my eyes shut as I placed my hands on my temples, rubbing them as if it would help the horrible ricocheting in my head. I fought the urge to throw up yet again as I stood, putting my hand on the headboard as I rocked on my feet. "Adam?" I called again as I stumbled forward. I made my way to the bedroom door expecting to see him on the couch but he wasn't. My heart started beating to match my headache.

"Adam!" I said, looking around the empty apartment as my breathing heaved.

I heard a soft moan from the kitchen and rushed towards the island, sliding on my socks around the it. I grasped the corner to slow myself as Adam came into view slumped against the cabinets with an empty bottle of SoCo. I bent down and tilted his head up. I knew he bought the bottle for New Years, but he hadn't touched it...until now.

"Adam...Did you drink that whole thing?"

"Head hurts," he said. His words slurred as his head fell forward into my chest. "Hold me."

"Come on," I said as I attempted to pull him up.

"Head hurts," he repeated, supporting his weight against mine. Mine was still pounding, but I was too busy concentrating on not dropping him to focus on it.

"Can you somewhat walk?" I asked as I leaned against the counter.

His head rolled from side to side. "Sure."

I kind of doubted his response, but somehow we managed to stumble our way to the bedroom where I dropped him on the bed and collapsed next to him.The pounding in my head rushed back, and I found myself breathing rapidly as the waves of pain squeezed against my skull.

"You okay?" Adam asked as he cuddled into me.

Not really.

"You shouldn't have drunk that whole bottle," I replied.

"Mhmm...tell me about it," he said, tucking his nose in my neck and letting his alcohol filled breath wash over me.

I gagged, turning my head away from him and staring at the wall of guitars. I wished he chose to play one of them to distract himself instead of get drunk, but I imagined it was easier to open the bottle and tip the liquid into his throat to numb his mind. A part of me understood the urge to drink, but for me, it just wasn't strong enough. I sighed as I turned and wrapped my arms around Adam, letting my hands drift over his arms until it lulled us both to sleep.

When I woke my eyes didn't hurt as much anymore, but the feeling of weight inside my chest hadn't lifted. I rubbed my face before rolling over to see Adam sitting by the window. His face was painted in pale moonlight, and his eyes were filled with the sadness that seemed to have become a part of us. He didn't stir as I crawled out of bed and moved towards him. His chest rose as he sighed and moved to pull me into his arms. He rested his head on my shoulder and his arms snaked around mine until our fingers intertwined. I looked down at him, and his eyes bore into mine and consumed every inch of my soul with the intensity of his emotions.

"How do we move forward?" he asked, his eyes lowering as his hands left mine, and his fingers swept over my skin in circles.

I let my body sink deeper into his arms as I took a deep breath. "We just do."

"You say that as if it's the easiest thing in the world," he answered, his fingers stopping and hovering over me as his chest rumbled with a sarcastic laugh.

I swallowed and pulled away, looking down at him as I turned in his lap.

"I didn't say it was going to be easy," I replied as I shook my head.

"Riv," his eye lashes fluttered; "I didn't mean it like that."

He pressed his fingers to his temples, and I felt my heartbeat slow as I watched him struggling for words to explain how he was feeling. I put my hands on his shoulders, letting my thumbs brush his neck now stippled with a heavy five o'clock shadow.

"I know... I just don't think there's a secret to getting over this," I replied, letting my shoulders rise and drop before I continued; "I don't think there really is a way to ever get over this. We just have to move on from it."

Adam's hands dropped over mine and the warmth of his touch spread up my limbs until I felt a small smile tugging at my lips.

"We have each other," I said.

Adam's eyes drifted from my lap, up my body until they met mine. "That's all we've ever really needed, isn't it?"

He licked his lips, and I felt the inevitable pull of my body towards his. He lifted his hand and let it caress my cheek, before slipping behind my neck and moving me towards him until our lips touched. It started with a soft kiss, but desperation sunk in as I leaned my body closer, and his hands drifted down my spine to grip my hips. His lips crushed into mine, spreading them so his tongue met my own. I tangled my hands in his hair as he moved my legs and stood, grabbing my ass before dropping my body on the bed without his lips leaving mine. I pulled away gasping, and he tucked his head into my neck, his tongue washing over my bare skin until I pushed him up and pulled his shirt over his head. His hands slipped under my shirt and lifted it over my head. His lips returned to mine before I pulled him back to me, his bare skin hot against me. I let the emotions consume me; let it settle the pain that rose inside my soul—to heal the pain I knew we shared. I let it consume and override the doubt that all we really needed was one another; that this empty hole could be filled with the love we felt for one another.