Phantom of the Apartment

Grudging Sidekicks

     "There is no way we are hunting down a murderer," Jason said, covering his face with a hand. His roommate had spent the last twenty minutes trying in vain to convince him that fighting crime was a great way to spend the next few weeks. "It's just crazy."

     Rebecca's face cracked into a grin. "He says to his dead roommate's ghost."

     Jason couldn't help it. He laughed. "Well, when you put it that way it sounds ridiculous."

     "It sounds as ridiculous as it is. Face the facts, Jason. Your life's already riding first class on the crazy train. You might as well go chase down a murderer."

     "Easy for you to say. You're already dead. You don't have to worry about being killed by an angry serial killer!"

     "Unless I can get killed twice."

     Jason raised an eyebrow. "Can you actually die twice?"

     "I really hope not," she laughed. "That kinda takes all the fun out of being dead."

     "I wasn't aware there was any fun in being dead to start with."

     "Sure there is! You can do stuff like this." Rebecca began floating up higher and higher. She went straight through the ceiling as though it was nothing. Then she reappeared beside him. "See? That was cool."

     "You're going to make us very unpopular with the neighbors if you make a habit of floating through people's floors uninvited."

     "Don't sweat it. They weren't even home."

     He frowned. "I'm pretty sure that's called breaking and entering, which is illegal."

     "I didn't break anything. I just entered."

     "That's not the point."

     "You know what they say. 'Nothing's illegal when you're dead.'"

     "That's not a saying," Jason exclaimed, exasperated. "No one has ever said that."

     "I just did, so now it's a thing. Go cross stitch it on a pillow so it's official."

     Jason sighed. "I knew I shouldn't have told you that I like to sew," he muttered in a frustrated tone.

     "Probably wasn't a great idea. Besides, if we do catch a murderer you get sew celebratory fuzzy socks or something."

     "And if we don't catch a murderer, I'll probably wind up dead in a dark alley somewhere and you'll need a new roommate."

     "Or we can both be ghost roommates together!"

     "Oh yeah," he said sarcastically. "That makes me feel a total of zero percent better about getting stabbed."

     "Or shot. We don't know what kind of weapons this person will use. But that's not the point," she added quickly after seeing the look on Jason's face. "The point is this person murdered me, I want some revenge." There was a wicked glint in her emerald eyes.

     "We don't know for sure if this person even killed you. You could have been this person for all we know," he said as he pointed to another article that proclaimed a girl named Rebecca Smith had died of the flu.

     "I know. But even if they didn't kill me, they killed someone. Somewhere, there's a family with one less member in it. And it says that no one was ever convicted. Which means the killer, whoever they are, is still waking free. Please tell me you can see why this upsets me."