The Bad Tour(ture): 2nd Edition

Chapter 11 - Fly Away

We were now in Osaka, Japan and it was October 9th.  We had three more shows before we would get a month break and come together again in Australia.  A woman from the lobby brought me up some mail. When I opened it, I was caught off guard and I collapsed to the floor and broke down in tears.

Rehearsals, Osaka Stadium

'What's wrong?' is the question everyone kept asking me.  And a fake smile and shrug is what they received.  I didn't want to tell anyone what was bothering me.  I couldn't.  I was still in shock. 

I couldn't let my personal problems ruin another performance though.  I had to prove myself.

Hotel

I was sitting in the middle of my bed with legs crossed, playing my acoustic guitar, writing a song.  A soft knock on the door distracted me.

I put my instrument down and ran to answer the door without looking through the peephole.  I was staggered to see Karen and Michael standing before me. 

I smirked at them and invited them in.  "What's up?"

Michael had his shades on which was a little odd to me but then again, it wasn't. 

"Well..." Karen started out, looking at Michael then back to me.  "Michael has something to say to you."

I looked at Michael, trying to look through his tinted lenses.  He had a deadpan look on his face.  I couldn't read him.

Karen nudged him.

"Thank you," he mumbled.

"For what?" I asked.

"Telling Frank about Jamila and my brother."

Karen looked at him confused.  I could tell he wasn't mentioning what he really came for. 

"I don't want to get into it but she was deceiving me," he said.

I tilted my head to the side and stared at him puzzled.  I didn't think he owed me a 'thank you' for that.

"No problem," I said. "Now tell me why you're really here."

Karen grunted.  "Oh geez.  Michael couldn't stop talking about you.  He's worried about you.  You seemed down in rehearsals today and he was afraid it would hinder your performance like last time."  She placed her hand on my arm.  "What's wrong, honey?" 

I frowned.  "It has nothing to do with you," I said to Michael.  "And don't worry. I won't let it affect my performance."

"What's wrong?" she asked again.

I looked towards the round wooden table, sitting in front of the window.  "You see those papers over there?" I nodded.  "That's what's wrong."

Michael didn't move but his eyes seemed to follow Karen who marched over to figure out what was on the table. 

Her eyes widened as she noticed it was divorce papers.  "Oh, honey," she said sympathetically as she continued reading.

Michael was frozen.  He was acting so weird. 

I walked over to my bed and sat down.  "I feel like such an idiot.  Like a failure."  I was talking to Karen.  I just pretended Michael wasn't even in the room.  "I fell out of love with him a long time ago and this is what I wanted.  I don't understand why I'm so hurt.  Why do I keep crying about it?"  I wiped the tears off my cheeks. 

Karen put the papers back on the table and slowly walked over to me.  "You know why."

I looked up at her confused.  I watched Michael walk over to check out the papers.  I looked back up to Karen.  "Why do I feel this way?"