One Shot Short Stories

Dear Ex

NOTE:HAHAHA! So, I was cleaning our dorm room this afternoon and I found this piece of paper which contains something interesting. hahaha! Pagkabasa ko, medyo natuwa ako kasi feeling ko wattpad worthy siya so I decided to post it here. hehe Nakakahiya man kasi it's something really personal pati makikita niyo yung kadramahan ko sa buhay. hahaha! But maybe, a lot of people who will be able to read this might learn from it so I'll tkae the chance. ^__^

To the people who knows me personally na nagdududa kung talaga bang nakamove on na ako, here's the proof. ^_^ I wrote this some months ago. So, if I was better during the time I wrote this, then I'm the best now. hihi!

Enjoy peeking into my personal life! HAHA!

Dear Ex,

It’s been 365 nights since you know... since we kind of lost it. Haha! Tandang tanda ko pa yung exact na nangyari nung araw na yun. Sweet pa tayo nun e. Binobola bola mo pa ko. Masaya tayo. Pero deep down inside, I knew there was something wrong. Wala naman tayong problema pero alam kong may mali. Siguro, ramdam ko na lang din na magbebreak na tayo.

Oh well... We broke up. You broke up with me. Sabi mo ikaw ang may kasalanan pero sabi mo din masaya ka naman sakin, seryoso ka naman sa relationship natin at minahal mo naman ako. I don’t really see the point. So, 365 nights later, hindi ko pa rin alam ang buong katotohanan ng break up natin. And here I am writing this letter na most probably e hindi naman makakarating sayo.

Nakamove on na ko. PROMISE! I no longer have feelings for you. I’m so sure about it. But since never namang nalinaw sakin yung break up natin and I have this weird thirst for knowledge, sinubukan kong i-analyze ang mga nangyari. And so, I’m going to tell you why we broke up instead.

I’ve come up with 5 theories. Pasensiya, scientist e. :)

1. Hindi naman kasi tayo nagligawan talaga. Nabasa mo ba yung article sa Varsitarian? Yung tunkol sa instant na pag-ibig? While reading that, naalala kita. Kung iisipin, instant naman talaga yung relationship natin. Nagkakilala, naging close, nagkagustuhan, pausong pseudo-relationship (na ako may pakana), two weeks later and we’re official. Hindi tayo nagligawan. Hindi mo pinaghirapan na maging girlfriend ako kaya siguro naging madali lang sayo na i-give up yung relationship natin. Instant love life? Apparently, instant break up din.

2. Maybe it’s you. No offense meant pero baka ikaw talaga yung problema? Maybe you’re just incompetent to be my boyfriend. Baka hindi compatible yung maturity level natin. Baka hindi mo kayang ihandle yung relationship natin the way I expected you to. But then again...

3. Maybe it’s me. Baka kasi ako naman talaga yung problema. Baka ako yung hindi competent para maging girlfriend mo. Baka hindi ko na-reach yung expectations mo sa relationship natin. Baka hindi ako yung tipo ng girlfriend na hinahanap mo. Baka marami akong naging pagkukulang sayo. Or maybe...

4. Hindi lang talaga sapat. Oo, Masaya tayo. Oo, seryoso tayo sa relationship. Oo, mahal natin isa’t isa. But maybe all of those things arent’t enough. Baka hindi pa sapat na Masaya tayo. Hindi sapat na seryoso tayo sa relationship natin. Hindi sapat yung pagmamahal. We needed something more and apparently, that “something more” cannot be achieved without pain and hardship. Naging duwag din kasi tayo e. Oo, nagging duwag tayo. Naduwag tayong maging malungkot. Naduwag tayong humarap sa problema. Naduwag tayong masaktan. Maybe the relationship was just too good to be true that it became superficial; that the only best thing to do with it is to end it while it’s still new...while it’s still great and the things we feared has yet to come. Siguro, talagang hindi sapat na masaya, seryoso at mahal natin ang isa’t isa. Siguro dapat naging matapang din tayo sa pagharap sa mga risk. Pero siguro, ganun talaga.

5. Baka kasi hindi talaga tayo ang para sa isa’t isa.

Kaya tayo nagbreak.

Sabi nila, sa bawat relationship, may dalawang possible destination. A) sa simabahan, to live happily ever after, or B) to go on separate ways. We obviously fell for the latter. Pero sabi din nila, sa bawat relationship na nagtatapos, dalawa ang posibleng mangyari. A) Ang magkabalikan, or B) Makahanap ng iba. You chose B). Ako? I’m still standing in between those two choices. Kasi, who knows? Mali pala yung theory #5 ko at tayo pa rin pala sa dulo. Though I honestly and sincerely don’t want to end there. I’m not closing my doors to possibilities but I’d really like to choose B) as well.

We fell in love. Things fell apart and we broke up.

365 nights later and so much has changed. Ibang babae na ang katext at binobola mo habang ako, heto, sinusulat ‘to. But I tell you, I am now better. And I would like to thank you for that. Salamat kasi tinuruan mo ko kung pano magmahal ulit. Tinuruan mo kong harapin yung fears ko, fears na hindi lang tungkol sa relationship but you know, all those fears I mentioned to you. Though there was one fear that I didn’t mention to you pero nagawa kong harapin because of you. My fear of losing you.

Salamat. Hindi na ko takot ngayon. Salamat, kasi nabreak tayo. Natuto akong mas mahalin yung sarili ko. Mas na-appreciate ko yung mga bagay na meron ako. Mas nagging malakas akong tao. I am better, indeed.

And the next time I fall in love?

I’ll make sure that’ll be way way better than what we had. I’ll make sure to do things right. Hindi na ko magjajump sa proseso. I’d be a better girlfriend. I’ll make sure that our love’s enough and that we’re both brave enough to hold onto each other.

And next time, I’ll make sure that we’re really meant to be.

Until my true “leading man” comes, I’d live my life happy and content. You won’t be hearing any news about me rushing into a relationship the way I rushed with you. ^_^

And when I do finally fall in love again, I’ll tell you about it.

In a letter again, maybe.

Until then, good luck to the both of us.

-Your Ex-Girlfriend