The Atheist & The Catholic

One.

I went straight to my room when I got home; noticing that my father was still passed out on the couch. I locked the door, stuffing a shirt in the crack at the bottom. I didn't need another lecture about smoking in the house. Closing my black curtains, my room was plunged into near complete darkness, making everything a dark grey. I turned on some music, letting myself fall onto my bed, just soaking the perfectness of the moment in. No people. No unwanted sound. No light. Just me and my music in the darkness of the room.

I lit up. Inhale. Hold it. Exhale. Smile.

I let my mind wander as I lay there filling my lungs. Really, what am I even doing with my life? I'm a senior in high school, shouldn't I have some type of plan for my life by now? I used to be such a good kid. Hell, I was the best kid. The kid everyone wanted to have. Pretty, smart, sweet, caring, helpful as all hell. What the fuck happened to me. And then I remembered why I was so fucked up.

Your mom died, fucking idiot.

Oh yeah... That's why.

With that thought fresh in my mind I took another long drag off the joint I held between my pointer finger and thumb. I loved the numbing feeling of it. The way it clouded my mind. It was like heaven on earth.

Yeah, heaven. Sure. I let out a humourless laugh at the thought.

I let my thoughts wander. Let them go back four years to a time when I was truly happy; a time when I still had my mother. I let the tears fall freely down my cheeks, wetting the blanket beneath my head. I sucked in more of the herbal smoke.

My phone rang in my back pocket.

"Hello?" I asked shakily into it.

"Hun, what's wrong?" Maddie. My bestfriend. Really my only real friend.

"Nothing. I'll be fine." I clear my throat, perching the joint between my lips to wipe away the tears.

"Do you wanna hang out later? There's a show at Water Street tonight; my cousin could get us in." She suggests, not prying about my tearful voice.

"Who's playing?"

"I think T. Mills. But don't quote me on it."

"Sure, I haven't seen him in a while. What time do you wanna go?" Jumping at the opportunity to see Travis.

"We should probably get there around 7. So I'll pick you up at 6 and we'll get dinner?"

"Sure. I'll see you then." We then said our goodbyes and hung up. This was exactly what I needed right now. A good show with good people and plenty of good music.

I went downstairs a while later to check on dad. He had woken up and was drinking coffee at the kitchen counter. I sat at a stool and grabbed a banana from the bowl in front of me.

"Hi daddy." I murmur, not wanting to set him off. I never know what type of mood he's in anymore.

"Hi, Sweetheart." He took a gulp of his warm drink. "When'd you get home? I didn't hear you come in."

"You were sleeping." He 'mmm'ed in response. "Is it alright if I go to a concert with Maddie tonight?"

"Scarlett, it's a school night." He frowned slightly at the idea.

"I know... But I really want to go, dad. Please? I'll be home by one. I promise." I begged him, even jutting my bottom lip out just a touch. He huffed out a sigh.

"Fine." I threw my arms around my father, thanking him repeatedly.

I went back up to my room a few minutes later, noticing it was already five o'clock. I decided to keep on my black, six button, 'pin-up' style high waisted shorts, throwing on a cute black and white polka dotted bralet. I slipped on my black Toms and messily threw my long, pink hair into a bun. I pulled back my bangs in a small 'bumped' style and secured it with a bobby pin before sliding a thin, black head band on. I touched up my makeup, darkening my eyebrows again and going over my winged eyeliner. I applied fake lashes, as I always did when going out, and deep red lipstick.

I took a step back from my full length mirror and gave myself a good once, twice, three times, over. I nodded pleasantly at my reflection.

"Perfect." I muttered softly.

I reapplied deoderant and perfume before gurgling once more with mouth wash. I tucket a few twenties into my shirt and slid my fake ID into the waist band of my underwear before deciding I was ready to go. My phone beeped with a text message only a few seconds later.

I'm outside. A loud beep followed shortly after the message.

"Scarlett! Your friend's here!" My dad called up the stairs.

"Coming!" I called back as I rushed out of my room and down the stairs. I said a quite 'see ya' to my dad and was out the door.