Misconceptions 》Styles

1.00

      "SKYLAR, DOLL, MOVE OVER A little over to the left would you? And smile wider, you look as if you don't want to be here, which is ridiculous really." Her voice comes off as a drawl as she waves her hand in front of her face, completely oblivious to the fact that no, I really don't want to be here.

        "Okay." I mutter, much too tired to argue with the woman I called my employer any longer. She did this often: give me a string of orders sometimes so rapidly I couldn't make out the words and expect me to follow them, not to mention perfectly and exactly how she wanted. Oh, and God forbid you argue with her or say the retched word, "no". You'd never hear the end of it. For this I simply plastered on a smile and did just what she wanted. Although, it wasn't too much of a stretch from my usual life, having to pretend absolutely everything was just lovely when in reality, it was quite the opposite.

        "Two minutes until the next shot, change quickly.” My eyes scan over the clothing rack, seeing nothing but swimwear. I swallow the lump in my throat, trying not to give off my discomfort.

          “Erm…Randy?”

          “Yes?" She deadpans, giving me a hard look. I was too slow. I wasn't good enough. I should have changed already, should have been on set and posing and smiling and having the time of my life. I could practically feel the disappointment radiating from her body, could see the thoughts racing through her head.

          “I thought we agreed I wouldn’t do the swimwear shots…you know I’m not comfortable with it.”

          “Well, you are the model of choice being that you’re a popular favourite. You’d do the best job.”

      "Yes but it’s just not me Randy.”

       “Skylar,” She sighed, her eyes rolling as she shifted her weight onto her other leg and began shuffling through the papers she hand clutched tightly in her hand. “You’re a model and as a model you need to understand that there are times when you will be required to do things even if you don’t want to do them, okay? You’re beautiful and the whole world loves you! Why would you be uncomfortable with this?” Why would I be uncomfortable? Was she off of her rocker? The mere thought of her believing I would be “okay” with this was mental really. I sigh, running a hand through my wavy brown locks.

     "Okay, fine.”

     “Brilliant! Now go get dressed, we need to get a few more shots in.” I nod, turning away from the perky red head and slipping inside of my dressing room. I wander over to the large and elegant white vanity, my hands pressing against the cool counter top as I lean forward, observing my reflection in the mirror. It was so easy. All I had to do was say yes to everyone, plaster on a smile and nod eagerly. All I had to do was say “I’m fine, thank you.” and they wouldn’t see a thing. They didn’t notice that on the inside, I was lost, scared, alone, miserable.

         In my mind there was a constant war. But they didn’t know, no one did. Not my mum or dad who I was always miles away from due to my job, not my coworkers who always cooed and complimented me, saying I was incredibly beautiful and how they envied me. Not Randy who was happy long as I did what she asked. No one. Because “when someone asks you how you are, they don’t really want an answer.” No one noticed my sunken green eyes, my forced smile, or my empty stomach. None of it. Because a smile can hide anything you want it to if the people are ignorant enough to believe it. Then of course, there was the fact that they didn’t really care.

       “Skylar!”

        “I’m coming Randy, I’m coming!” I tear my eyes away from the monster in the mirror and turn on my heel, snatching a glitter covered hot pink bikini from the door. I shut my eyes as I peel off my clothing from the previous shoot, replacing my undergarments with the swimwear.