Friday Night Dinner's

13.

(Santana's POV)

"Brittany..." what the hell is she doing here! "Santana!" she looks as taken back as I feel right now. "What are you doing here?" I ask her frantically. "It's Mia's parent's anniversary party. What are you doing here?" she returns the question, her face frantic. "Gia's parents have mutual friends with who I am assuming are your girlfriend's parents!." neither one of us say another word, we just have a stare off. "Uh ladies..." the bartender pulls our attention. "Drinks?" he says, reminding us both why we were clearly at the bar. "I am not thirsty." I spit, not diverting my look away from Brittany before walking away into the middle of the crowded room. I feel like everything is closing in on me. I took this trip to get away from Brittany and that whole fucking shit show of a situation. I can feel my palms sweating, going a little light headed. I cannot pass out. I muscle my way back through more people and burst out through some double doors onto the deck area.

This isn't happening, this isn't happening, this cannot be happening! I hold onto the railings to steady myself as I take a few deep breaths. "Hey, what are you doing out here? Did you get our drinks?" I feel Gia's hand on the small of my back as she announces her presence. "I-I uh..I needed some fresh air." I gulp. "Babe, are you okay? You look like you have seen a ghost?" Gia says scanning my face. "No no no, no ghost. Just a nightmare." I mutter the last part. "What?" Gia says, not realising she wasn't meant to hear anything. "How about I get us those drinks now huh?" I say changing the course of conversation. "Uh okay.." Gia says, she knows I am acting off, so I don't think she pushes anymore. How am I going to navigate this tonight? It is going to be awkward as hell. I try and think of a million different ways on how I can keep not only me away from Brittany, but Gia too. If she spots Brittany she will undoubtedly want to talk to her as we don't know all that many people here.

I step back inside and spot a clear path to the bar, I scan the room quickly and I can't see Brittany or Mia. So I make a run for it, I am like a horse with blinkers on, I don't look away from the bar and charge forward, I am within touching distance and I feel someone yank me off to the side, pulling me into a small and cramped cupboard.

(Brittany's POV)

I spot Santana heading back to the bar, she hasn't noticed me, now is my chance. Just before she reaches the bar I reach my arm out and pull her off her course as I pull us into a really small utility cupboard. "What the hell!?" Santana looks confused until she properly registers it's me. "Nope." she says and goes to push past me to let herself out, but I step to the side to block her. "You can't ignore me all night." I tell her. "Watch me" she says, her face hard and unemotional. "Santana please" I plead a little. "Brittany, I have absolutely nothing to say to you right now. Nothing that you will want to hear anyway. I just want to enjoy my night and now I can't. This feels awkward right now." she confesses. 

Her confession breaks me a little. In all the many years Santana and I have been best friends, one thing we have never ever felt between us was awkwardness.  "Look, I just..I want to say I am so so sorry." I say. "I don't want your apology Brittany, you have already said sorry a thousand times. What can I do with an 'I'm sorry'? I don't want you to be sorry if that is how you felt, what I want is to know if that is how you still feel." she chides. "I-I don't know" I confess meekly. "You don't know?" she repeats, crossing her arms over her chest, it's like she is irritated by my presence. "Oh come on San, you know it is not that simple. We are both in relationships, other people can get hurt if I say yes to that question. It is no longer just us." I defend.

"There was a Gia, there was always a Gia! You could have said something a lot sooner!" her voice almost becoming a shout. "And what? You would have dumped Gia and ran straight into my arms? You don't feel the same way about me." I cry. "The damage would be far less! Now please, leave me alone." she doesn't give me a chance to respond, she barges past me and out of the cupboard, assuming for a stiff drink from the bar.