In Waves | ✔️

72 | selfless

When visiting hours are over and Mom and Derek have gone home for the night, Dawn gets me permission to stay in Rob's room after hours. Even if he's sleeping, I just want to be alone with him, and I don't want to take this time for granted. Maybe because it's the only time in his life where he can't jump up and flit off to do something. He has no choice but to be anchored to his bed.

"They didn't have any strawberry," I say, handing him the orange jello cup he made me get from the cafeteria.

He wrinkles his nose as he takes it, digging the plastic spoon in. I do the same with mine, sitting on the edge of his bed, but he soundlessly scoots over and makes a space for me next to him. I cautiously move, leaning against his pillows as unobtrusively as I can. He's like a deer I'm trying not to spook, careful to tiptoe around him before he freezes or bolts. Or in this case, banishes me to the chair.

"The doctor said I won't be out of here for Christmas," he mutters in annoyance. "I thought miracles were meant to be a dime a dozen this time of the year."

"You survived a car crash and you can walk. I think you're good on the miracles front."

"I'm not arguing with that, but it's Christmas, Lia. Christmas. And this is like the most depressing place ever."

"Then we'll just bring Christmas to you," I counter, scooping up a wobbly spoon of jello.

He goes quiet in thought, melding into the quietness of the hospital. Faint voices and footsteps pass outside his room every once in a while, and now that he's doing okay, the hospital doesn't feel so eerie anymore. It feels peaceful.

"I saw Clara today," he subtly announces.

I haven't wanted to broach the topic of Clara at all, especially after our fight. "You saw a lot of people today."

"Mm-hm, but I didn't ask all of them out."

I sharply turn to him. "You asked her out?"

"Out like, when I can actually get out of this place, but yeah. We talked and I guess she's like... my girlfriend now?" Rob catches himself, smiling. "Jesus that sounds weird." He glances at my glowing face. "Cut it out."

"I didn't do anything!"

"You did, though," he sighs, focusing on his cup. "You were right, about me being like Dad. Being so scared of being like him. Same DNA doesn't mean I can't be better than he was. Guess it just took a little near-death experience to give me some perspective."

I'm smiling so hard my cheeks hurt, and I feel so much pride I want to burst into confetti, but I keep myself from overreacting. "At least one good thing came out of this crappy accident, then."

He chuckles. "Yeah, who would've thought? Girlfriend." He shakes his head, rolling the word under his breath.

"And just like everything you do, you're going to nail the whole relationship thing, you know. Through all the bad stuff, too."

"Oh yeah, can't wait to nail those glorious fights," he drawls. "Mom and Dad gave me tons to look forward to with that shit."

"Everyone doesn't fight like they did," I say, rolling my eyes.

"Hope not. No one should get to the point of constant screaming matches. They really gave us a good blueprint of what to avoid, huh?"

"Yeah, but it wasn't that constant. I mean, bad, really bad... but not constant. Thank god."

Rob slowly turns to me, scanning my face. "You don't remember, do you?"

"Remember what?"

He wavers before he sinks into the pillows. "Never mind. Forget I said anything."