Kalhi : Silent Shadows

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by esthetiquecommunity

by esthetiquecommunity

Silent Shadows by BelleOfHart
Reviewer: kalhixo

Maven and her friends are thrust with the fate of a perilous journey across strange lands! A favorite trope among fantasy readers.

The cover is not pleasing to the eye. I can't see the font clearly and there is no alignment in terms of color nor title. The blurb is good with introducing all necessary characters. I'd suggest adding more details on what obstacles there are.

GENRE

Compared to other novels in the genre, this story has a lot of elements that's expected in a fantasy novel. A call to adventure, strange creatures, quests, danger etc.

CHARACTERS

I liked Koda very quickly. The strategy of letting the character save a cat was executed nicely and contrasted with the way he was willing to look away to clear his debt. The contrast also gives the impression of a deeply complex individual. Edit: As I progress through the chapters, his charisma is decreasing because it's becoming more overt and cliche.

About Mavern, I'd like to know why she got on the train as soon as possible. Without the reason, it just seems like she's following around Koda. Even if she was doing that, readers need to know why she would want to do that. Looking back, this applies to Koda as well. Establishing character goals are important.

WORLDBUILDING

Sometimes the world building is done while the characters are in action. This is good. But sometimes the meaning gets lost. I had to read it two or three times to gain some sort of understanding. So, A for effort, but some editing is necessary.

PLOT

The story jumps into action right from the get-go. I loved how the regular lifestyle of Koda was shown but it was interesting because he was no ordinary person. Therefore the portrayal of his general life was necessary and kept me reading further!

I think the B plot (romance) can slow down a bit. The second time they meet they both have already developed some sort of romantic feeling for each other. They even hold hands and do intimate things that strangers who just met each other do not do. As a reader, I felt it was too rushed.

WRITING STYLE

I liked a lot of elements in this story and the concise writing style plays a big part in that. One small thing that I'd like to give my two cents on is about writing emotion.

Koda smirks way too much. I understand that he's charming but I recommend editing out at least half the smirks. I do like the instance when he grins to show off his pointed teeth though. Moreover, my point applies to all characters. Smirking and blushing are very typical and overused actions that don't mean much. Your writing style would be much better off with other details.