Visit Thirteen

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VISIT THIRTEEN:

Reason: Check up

Symptoms: None

Time in: 10:00 am January 17th, 2015


Rosie wished that she had not tried to become friends with Jennie, or anything really. Maybe they should have stayed rivals, or whatever. Because of course Rosie was going to end up liking the hottest person on the planet, if they became friends. It was inevitable.

Worse than liking Jennie was Jane’s reaction to Rosie liking Jennie. Not that Rosie meant for her to ever find out in a billion years. It just kind of happened because Rosie had left her laptop open with the google search: can I date my doctor.

Jane hadn’t had a hard time putting two and two together. And with Jane knowing there was a new pressure on her, this feeling that she had to do something. Jane wouldn’t say anything explicitly, but she had this way of hinting at things constantly. This look she could give at any time.

But Rosie couldn’t actually say anything to Jennie. Her doctor. She barely knew Jennie afterall so the whole thing was just, ugh. Rosie groaned, tapping her foot against the floor of the office.

Why. Why why why why whhhhhhyyyyy WHY -

“Rosie?”

Rosie snapped her head up to look up stupid Jennie with her stupid, great face. Rosie should say something witty, sassy even. Rosie realized she was smiling. There went that plan. “Hi.”

Jennie glanced down at her own shoes, then back up. She had the chart in her hand, but something else as well. Rosie arched up so she could see a little better but then Jennie jerked away. What the hell?

“How was your christmas?” she asked, her voice a little flimsy, shakey.

Rosie stood up, wondering what Jennie was now hiding behind her back. “Uh...good.” She went to see the family while Jane and Lisa took some weekend trips to a bed and breakfast like annoying couples tend to do. “What about--”

Before Rosie could finish Jennie shoved something into her hands, a CD. A CD in a clear, thin cover. Rosie looked at it. “Is this a mixed CD?” she asked, touched and a little light headed, but also curious as to whether they were in the 90’s or not.

“It’s just something I recorded. Piano tracks. I play every day and you gave me that CD of yours once, so I thought it would help for you to know at least a few classics, and--”

Rosie hugged Jennie before she could say anything else, her arms wrapped around tight, hands clasped in the middle of Jennie’s back. She didn’t mean to do that, didn’t mean to get this close. Her heart was pounding, the kind of pounding she got before live shows, that nervous thump that made the blood rush to Rosie’s head.

Jennie stayed stiff at first before dropping her shoulders and awkwardly hugging back with only one arm. She rested her chin against Rosie’s shoulder.

And for a moment Rosie thought she could have stayed there forever. With Jennie who smelt like disinfectant but was also so warm, and kinder than she let on. The feeling of never wanting to let go was what made Rosie drop her hold and take a step back, though. Because in reality, it couldn’t happen. She had a tour in a little over a month, Jennie was her doctor - and it just couldn’t happen. Couldn’t happen.

“Thank you,” Rosie said, “I didn’t even know you played.” The thought of Jennie’s fingers drifting lightly over keys was soothing, a warm image.

Jennie nodded. “Merry Christmas, again.”

“Happy new year,” Rosie said back. They were still just a little too close, Rosie could feel Jennie’s breath, body heat. This was not good. Also, was Jennie leaning in? Rosie thought she was leaning in. She was totally leaning in.

Rosie looked at her lips. Not expecting anything even though Jennie was definitely leaning in. Or maybe Rosie was leaning in, or maybe they were both leaning in. It didn’t matter because suddenly the only thing Rosie wanted was Jennie’s light-shaded lip gloss blended in with hers.

And then, Jennie didn’t move back so much as she fucking jumped back as if compelled by a higher power. Jennie cleared her throat, wiped her hands on her pants. “Table?” she asked.

Rosie looked at the examination table and then back at Jennie. Her head was spinning, but she could always blame that on the anemia. It was the anemia’s fault she was in the position in the first place, and that she liked Jennie so much, and that Jennie was so hot, and that all of the blood was rushing to the surface of her skin, and that - in general - she was fucked.


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