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: sorry :


Aria's death has been a huge impact on me.

I've been able to hold my feelings in.

I tried; it worked sometimes but not all the time.

It's been a couple days since she's jumped.

Now her funeral is coming up.

Everyone knows I've been close to aria so they send me letters or pretend as if they are sorry for me just to make me feel better, it doesn't make me feel better at all if anything it makes me feel worse because I could have stopped her, but I didn't.

I could have stopped her, but I didn't. Why didn't I?

I was just laying around in my apartment.

Nothing to do, or I just didn't want to do anything.

I just bathed in my tears all day.

Barely ate.

I walked around my house trying to find something to do, trying to find something that won't remind me of her.

Anything.

Something.

My phone started ringing.

It's been ringing more than ever these past couple days.

I just wanted to be alone and not to talk to anyone.

No one at all.

I picked my phone up and answered the call.

"Hello? Hello? Y/n are you there" a voice says talking quickly but sounded as if they were calling.

"This is?"

"aria's mom, remember me?" she says.

"Yes, I do."

"Honey are you okay, you don't sound like you're doing well" she says.

Silence.

There was no way she thought I was ok.

I treated her more like family than her own FAMILY.

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