Heartless People |Book 3|

Chapter 15

"Insanity is relative. It depends on who has who locked in what cage."

—Ray Bradbury

BAMBAM

Stepping out of the closet, I watched while she gazed at the rising sun. She held herself tightly as if she were trying to hold herself together. She hadn't even bothered to get dressed or fix her hair. She just stood there, staring. It was like we were mourning and I didn't even know why.

"Mina," I called out to her.

She turned around, and looked me over with no emotion on her face.

"Where are you going?" she asked.

"Lisa wants to go for a run."

She shook her head before she turned back to face the window. "She calls and you go running like her dog."

"Mina—"

"You make me sick sometimes, bending over for your little sister, hoping that she'll finally bring you into the fold. When will you get it? She hates you. She will never love you. She only puts up with you, with us, because we are 'family.' Sometimes I wish you would be a man. Why is that so hard for you to even attempt?"

My first instinct was to wrap my hands around her neck and twist it off. Instead, I took a deep breath. "Why is it so hard for you to understand that you are not important?" I calmly asked her as I put on my watch.

"Excuse me?" She turned back to me.

"You. Are. Not. Important," I said slowly. "You want me to be a man? From the very moment Jen came into this family, you've been jealous. No, this is beyond jealousy. This is insanity. No matter what you do, you will never be on that level. When will you understand? Why is that so hard for you to get?"

"Screw you and Jen!" she snapped before she stormed off into the bathroom.

Without a word, I walked out the door to find Lisa waiting. She looked at me, but said nothing and I wasn't sure whether or not she'd heard us. If she did, she didn't make it obvious. Setting the timer on her watch, we began our silent run outside the door with Chanyeol following close behind.

I had no idea where we were going, but for some reason I wasn't worried. If she was going to kill me, she would've thought of something much more fucked up and intricate than going for a run. Ten minutes later I finally understood; she wanted to race.

"I don't even fucking know where we're going!" I yelled as she sped up.

"Not my fucking problem," she shouted in reply, running faster.

Just as I was about to pass her, the son of a bitch turned the fucking corner and ran on towards the bridge. Unless she planned on jumping off, I knew I could pass her and I did, but she easily came up next me and matched my speed.

From somewhere behind us, Chanyeol passed us both, which caused us to pause for a moment, though we keep jogging in place to keep our legs from tensing up.

"Isn't he your bodyguard?" I asked him.

"Bloody Koreans. All of them are out to piss me off," she replied before she sprinted forward, and caught up to Chanyeol. As she passed by, she looked back and glared at Chanyeol, causing the dark haired man to smirk.

Finally we reached the Arlington National Cemetery and Chanyeol fell back. We ran on until Lisa stopped at the base of two of the white graves.

'Eli and O'Neal Manoban' the gravestones read and I felt a chill run up my spine.

"Brothers," Lisa said. "They were United States military aviators who commanded the "Flying Spades" during World War II."

"Wow." Where had she found this? How had she found this?

"O'Neal killed Eli, he shot his own brother right out of the sky without realizing it. He was later captured and tortured by the enemy, and he died on a rescue mission back home."

"You think I'm going to shoot you out of the sky?" I asked her, as I stared at the graves and she snickered.

"No. This time I'm in the position to clip your wings, brother." She turned to face me and her face was dripping with as much sweat as mine. "I took Nickhun out for dinner and poisoned him right at the table. I knew without a doubt that he would never betray me, but I still wanted to get my point across. I don't hold that same confidence with you."

Shaking my head, I tried to figure out what to say.

"Lisa—"

"No." She cut me off. "You are my brother, despite everything we've been through no matter how much I've threatened or fought with you, my blood is your blood. And no matter what, I would like to say that killing you would bring me dissatisfaction."

"I do not know what I can do to ease—"

"We think that Mina is a mole," she said, and she might as well have cut me off at the knees.

"Lisa..." I couldn't believe what I was hearing. "You think Mina is feeding information to...that is...that's insane."

"It is either you, or her, or the both of you. So tell me, brother, are you the mole?" she asked and I felt Chanyeol step up behind me.

I stared into her eyes. My little sister, and yet there is nothing small about her. She was like a giant, and for the first time I saw what my father did. How can one person hold so much pride and confidence?

"Are you the mole, brother? Are you the reason why I spent five months away from my son? Why my wife was ripped away from us? Why she spent months running? Tell me right now and it will be clean. One bullet and I will personally bury you."

My mouth dropped open and before I knew it, I answered with more confidence than I knew I had.

She nodded. "Then it's your wife."

"She's my wife," I repeated. Slower, to myself, as I ran my hand through my hair. "You have to give me more proof than that, Lisa."

"Think about it, Bambam. Think of everything...can you say with a hundred percent certainty that your wife is not a mole?"

I wanted to confidently deny her accusations. I want to tell her that she was insane, that this whole thing was just madness and she and Jen were just paranoid. But I couldn't, and I saw my life with Mina flash before my eyes. From the moment she first smiled at me to our moment in the bedroom. It was like a silent movie.

"I love her," I whispered to her.

She placed her hand on my shoulder. "I know. Which is why I wanted to tell you. We aren't going to do anything about it right now. Once we confirm it for your sake, we will use her and then we will—I need you not to break under this, brother. We need you. I need you. I understand your pain, and I don't say that lightly. Five months in the dark, not knowing whether or not my wife was safe, being away from my family, from my newborn son...believe me, I understand. But we are blood before anything else. This family, our name, is what we fight for. Mina went against that. She didn't betray just Jen and me. She betrayed Mother, Father, Nickhun, Victoria and you. She betrayed our way of life. I don't want to shoot you out of the sky, not for anything. Not for her."

With that, she and Chanyeol continued their run back, leaving me behind. I stood there for a moment, staring down at the graves. I stayed still for an hour before I walked my sorry ass home. I knew the way, and with each step I remembered how happy Mina had been when Lisa and Jen were gone. She glowed with a radiance that I hadn't seen in years.

She wanted to be important. The final nail that pierced through me came when I finally made it back to our room. I entered to find her sitting on the bed, dressed in black, with her hair curled. And donning her feet were whites shoes. Jen's white shoes...

"I'm so sorry, Bambam," she whispered as she came closer to me. "I was just in a bad mood and I just had so much on my mind."

When she reached for me, I backed away.

"I'm all sweaty. We'll talk after I clean up." I kissed her cheek before I retreated into the bathroom.

When had the world changed so much? Had I been asleep the entire time?