Andy On My Mind (1D/ Liam Payne)

CH14

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I am awfully nervous about posting this chapter. I've thinking about it all day and there's this lump in my throat. I really hope that this comes acros well and I hope that you guys continue to care for this story as much as I do. As always, do let me know what you all think. The last chapter got so many comments it literally blew my mind. A lot of you said that you've been fangirling over this story, well, trust me, I fangirl over you guys too.

I've got my fingers crossed  you all like it xx

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 “He's going to do incredible,” Austin marvelled, his forehead pressed up against the glass of the sliding doors. Everyone was trying to sneak a peek of the auditions that were going on outside, trying to gauge the competition. I, on the other hand, remained seated on the couch in the corner, trying to disappear into the background.

“Liam's voice goes beyond his age,” another one of the contestants agreed, though I didn't know which one because this time, I kept my head down as I fumbled with my fingers. I tried desperately to tune them out but it was just my luck that the very person that I wanted to forget was the person that was in the centre of everyone's attention.

“He'll definitely get in. He's got the voice, the looks, and the personality,” someone else said. “He's the nicest person ever.”

I tried not to cringe as they continued to dictate everything that was good about Liam, everything that I would miss out on from now on. It was only fitting that he was chosen to audition first, and I, last. We were at opposite ends of the list to perform, just like how we were in reality, with a massive distance between us. The very ocean that we swam in last night is the same one that turned against me and started drowning me. We all knew though, we all knew: It was my fault.

It took all of me to not plug my fingers into my ears to block all the sound out. Especially when Liam's voice started to drift through the glass as he sang his song.

“A million love songs later, and here I am trying to tell you that I care. A million love songs later, and here I am.” His last lines hung in the air while the music came to a halt. For around ten minutes, Simon and the guest judge, Sinitta, deliberated Liam's fate. While everyone waited for the decision with bated breath, it was complete and utter silence, and all I could hear was the rapid thumping of my heart, threatening to spew out of my chest.

The tension was at an all time high while the contestants tried to lip-read what was being said outside. When Liam was dismissed, everyone crowded around the sliding door in attempt to get the news first. I, on the other hand, remained where I was, stood by the corner near the couch with my feet anchored to the ground.

My breathing hitched as I caught a half a second glimpse of him between everyone's heads, making his way back to the house. The sliding door opened slightly and the sea of people parted to make way for him, just enough for me to get a good view of him with his eyes trained to the floor. Everyone looked at him expectantly, waiting for him to announce the result, but by just taking into account the way that his shoulders were slumped defeatedly, I could already tell. He lifted his head and his eyes instantly met mine, and I not only could tell, with just one look, I knew.

That's when the feeling on my feet returned instantly. I hastily removed myself from the situation, looking away and walking briskly out of the room, narrowly avoiding the cameramen that were still focused on the huddle with Liam in the middle of it. As I urgently walked away, rounding the corner, finally away from direct contact of Liam's gaze, my breathing became quick pants, and the all too familiar feeling of panic encompassed every inch of me. My senses seemed heightened but there was an inconsistency with my footsteps and the thumping sound. Neither seemed to match each other. The sound came after the steps, almost as if they were following me. I willed my legs to move faster, trying to fight back the constricting feeling in my chest. The world beneath me was spinning and no matter what I did, there wasn't enough air going into my lungs. Tears started to form in my eyes and that's when I began to sprint, blindly running towards the washroom.