Beautiful Mistakes

Chapter 12

Camille's P.O.V

I get off the phone for the thousandth time as I try to reach Sebastian but it still doesn't connect. Each time I try it just goes to voicemail and I can't help but feel worried although am not showing it.

Since the day we went grocery shopping together its like he vanished. No calls, no messages, no visits... Nothing and its almost a month.

I miss his company, his bothersome self, his eyes, his occasional hunger ... I miss him.

Hard to believe I admitted that but I did and it's true.

I've had Velaris for almost a week now and just the thought of Sebastian not warming up to her and sharing his loving self with her makes me feel bad.

Deja has not made it any easier, she's been holding up with home issues that she doesn't explain to me about and she also fails to appear at work for our usual dances.

Maybe am overthinking it but something is not on the right track. First Sebastian and now Deja although I feel like her situation is more like avoiding me since she rarely calls like before I'm just trying to ignore it.

That feeling..

I know its fucked up but I still have a strong urge in me to protect them, both of them. They are my family, my responsibility and I am responsible for their battles, I own their battles.

As long as I welcomed them in my circle they are now my bosses, not in a degrading way but in a I have to protect them way. Just like I am for Velaris, Olivia and dad it is no different with them.

I have to protect them, always.

But who protects you? :(

Does it matter? As long as they are okay then I am.

I can't show them weakness I have to be strong for-

"Mommy, can we pwese call daddy befowe I go to bed." Velaris asks as she runs through my open balcony door cutting short my thoughts.

She stands in cute pajamas with dolls all over looking innocent. She is now lively and enjoys being the kid she is. Her weight is now on check with some cheeks forming on her from how much she eats.

One week surely had a lot of impact on her although not entirely.

At times at night once I come back home from the club she comes in my room crying that her dad was in her room trying to take her back with him or worse.

I hate it when she comes to me screaming and crying. All I can do is just try to soothe her and wipe her tears promising her protection.

Her nightmares break her to a point that she fears sleeping alone or even without cuddling Fifi who usually has no issue with it. Every time she is that weak I end up cuddling her in my arms till she falls asleep, then I lay her on my bed and just stay awake watching her.

I might sound weak, but every time she comes to me broken its like I suddenly reappear at that house when I was young. All the pain and misery flashes and what's worse is although it's vague and most likely false, I usually feel all the pain in it.

That feeling is enough for me to lack any kind of sleep. It pushes me to stay awake and watch her, not letting my fears torment me or try and break me any further. I cant let them, I don't want to be or feal weak and helpless.

Like I usually did.

That's why I need to be strong, for her.

"Sure sweetie, go get your tablet so we can face time him." I answer her as she rans back inside in joy.