Heartstrings

Chapter Eleven

Cleo

I would never date someone like Nina, because I didn't like girls who only looked out for themselves. But I was still drawn to her. She looked lonely, standing outside Reid's house and it hurt me, for some strange inconceivable reason.

I watched Nina play with Tony's feelings throughout the past year, and I wondered why she never stopped. Tony's love for her was clear as day, but I could never begin to fathom what he saw in Nina. I only saw the bad, so I didn't bother to search for any good. Somehow, that was more than enough for me to follow the same route as Tony. To care about Nina.

After that kiss, I left Nina outside Reid's house and drove around in my car mindlessly, trying to eradicate any lingering lust from my senses. I was seeking comfort, and Nina just happened to be there. In retrospect, it was a horrible idea to notice Nina, to wonder how it would be to kiss her. Now that I knew? I needed to forget, to re-establish our old pattern. Where Nina was just another acquaintance, someone I was forced to be civil with, for the sake of my friends. Not someone I kissed. And definitely not someone that I could want.

When I thought about my type in girls, Mallory came to mind. I admired my best friend because she was kind and loving. She faced so much in her life and still prevailed. When I became friends with her, I realised that Mallory had flaws, but they only made her more beautiful. She could sometimes lose sight of what mattered most. Her relationship with Reid was at stake in that respect.

The only person I could trust was Tony. I drove back to his parents' house and knocked on the door.

"You might as well take the keys already," Tony's handsome face appeared round the front door, and his eyebrows rose as he took me in. "Cleo."

"Hi. Can I come in?"

He waved for me to come in. I did so, cautiously. I wish I hadn't, because the first thing I saw was Reid's smiling face. I hadn't seen him since I returned to the hospital on my visit with the rest of our friend group, sans Mallory, of course. He looked so lost and confused, but I saw that he was trying to hold it together for us. Reid was still sweet and sacrificing, even in his own plight.

We went to Tony's room. I came here first in high school, two years ago. It was crazy, to think about how much could change in two years.

"Nina told me that she didn't want to be friends anymore because she thinks I have feelings for her." Tony said, toying with his duvet. I was in his room, sitting against the side of his bed with my legs crossed. He was opposite me, head bent down, hair falling in his eyes as he spoke.

I could see that Tony needed to talk to someone. The responsibility on his shoulders must have been driving him insane, now that Reid was more vulnerable. I saw even more than that, though; I saw how profoundly Nina's blunt rejection hurt him. A million emotions were playing out across his face; humiliation, heartbreak, melancholy. There were oceans of sadness in his eyes.

I felt even more guilty when I thought about the fact that I'd kissed her, straight after she rejected him. And she had fully reciprocated it. But that was too fresh to think about.

"Maybe Nina feels intimidated."

He looked up at me in surprise. "By me?"

I rolled my eyes. Tony was the least intimidating person on the planet. "No, your feelings for her. They obviously run deep."

Tony avoided my eyes. "I know that Nina doesn't commit. That's why I never told her, but she still cut me off anyway." Tony said, huffing out a frustrated sigh as he leaned back against his bed. "Now I feel even more pathetic."