𝐃𝐀𝐌𝐍𝐄𝐃𝐄𝐒𝐓 | sung hanbin

𝟎𝟏𝟏 back to you

i walked hand in hand with hanbin, joining the others as the camera flashes went off.

'are you both really dating?' hanbin waves our interlaced hands up in the air and the crowd goes wild, some distasteful comments and some congratulations flying by.

'is Juri moving back in town?' another reporter asks to a short height brunette standing between jiwoong and reina and that's when i realized that she must be his younger stepsister.

jiwoong answers instead of her, 'you never know, mother is moody.', it rolls off as a joke as the brunette awkwardly chuckles and the reporter moves to ask reina. i don't easily get impressed but the emerald a-line halter top open back dress really won me over. not too much but on point for tonight. reina vibe checked humans, all really dress well.

i sigh a relief as we finally enter the hall, hating how much the media was invading the privacy, i have always hated such gatherings. it was a soiree for Serena and Mr. Kim Taemin's marriage or simply put taerae's father and jeonghyeon's half mother's marriage. i swear they have the most complicated family tree like jiwoong is taerae's distant cousin? welp and i almost dosed off when meijin explained the drama behind it.

'sweetheart?' i smile looking up at him and he simply smiled back. the stare makes my smile flatter as a strange pit forms in my stomach, this is fake. we are in a fake relationship and we have boundaries.

'what are you thinking about?' his palm leaves my low back and i grimace at the cliche of missing the warmth.

fuck, i feel like puking at thought of sweet romance right now. i am not ready for it and nor can i give him what he wants. yet after seeing him after a week almost made me miss him.

it's almost felt like he could read my change in mood but reina and the Kim siblings joined us before he could press further on the topic.

i do brighten on seeing the dress again.

'I love that dress on you' the girl smiles back widely in response.

'and you look perfect as usual' i smile back at her, wiping down my satin cerulean dress.

'jiyong' she introduces herself and i take her outstretched hand, i think i like her.

'kyujin'

'i love my best friends bonding' reina beams and tangles her arms with ours bringing us to another table leaving the guys behind.

mel and yunjin introduce themselves as well and though i have heard of them, today's the first time we have had any conversation.

'wait it was you?' jiyong nods embarrassed yet fuming in anger as rei reveals that she was the frosting girl. [reference to shortcake!]

'melissa, i really wanted to kill your bestfriend then and there. he ruined my favourite dior maxi dress and i am never forgetting that!' mel chuckles and nods agreeing to that feeling.

'yeah man if someone ruined any of my clothing i would be pissed, like once a guy tore of the most comfortable lace panties during sex and i dumped him right there' we all laugh empathizing as yunjin pouts continuing more about terribly gone wrong events in her life.

'hey girls' ricky and junhyeon greet and take the empty seats next to mel.

'kids this is a female table, go chatter with guys' mel says pointing to the table where the guys could be awkwardly seen conversing. my stomach flutters as he passes me a sweet smile upon eye contact and diverts his attention back to jiwoong.

why do i always feel the urge to be around him?

'......' the mic shrieks as Serena taps on it and for once i don't hate her for distracting me from my thoughts.

'thank you everyone for joining us on this special evening. i don't think i could have any better people i call as my family so thank you taemin for this and my two sons tonight i confess that i truly love the both of you. i hope you all enjoy the evening.' i glance down at the table my family was sitting.

the terrible image of my mom lying in a pool of blood and dad beside her side crying flooded my head. I knew dad loved her more than world and because of that bare minimum dad hates my face for resembling her while he has to continue life with taeri.

she trys hard to win dad over but i love that he is still stuck over mom. I can't ever forgive him for moving on.

i am immediately disturbed when a warmth fills the empty seat beside me and the oh so familiar hand rests on my knee, his thumbs rubbing the skin gently.

'what's wrong? i can tell you're about to cry' why is he doing this? matthew isn't even attending the ceremony and wasn't he hating me yet that almost wants me to break down in his comfort but i can't let anyone see my vulnerable side.

'something went in my eyes' he grabs my chin lightly to lift my face up, a soft glance and he pulls me up to my feet and drags me towards one of the restrooms. i hate him.

the feel the heat of questioning stares from the guests who must have witnessed the exchange between us irritates me.

'tell me kyujin' the dilemma intensified as he called my name. i don't want to give him answers to any of his questions. i can't.

he closes the distance as his palms graze the side of my cheeks, timidly cupping them.

'kyujin, are you avoiding me?' my only defense mechanism i recognize is that i value self-preservation by hiding my true self and vulnerability because i can't stand not being in control of my emotions and i fucking hate this feeling.

'That honestly shouldn't concern you' i mellow mere as a whisper.

he lets his hand fall beside him.

'okay but please do tell why were you teary? did i do something?' i suck in a deep breath trying to control my anger because fuck i don't want to loose him.

'no and no. i would appreciate if you mind your own business'

his jaw hardens and his expression is unreadable yet somewhat annoyed.

'i think you misunderstood something sweetheart, i am minding my business because i need to know if i do something wrong'

'no you didn't' he doesn't reply, simply studying my face as i start feeling agitated. i hate this, i hate him looking at me, i hate the sticky dress, i hate my weirdly tied up hair, i hate the clinking bracelet on my wrist, i hate-

'breathe' i realize only then that i had been crying.

'fuck off hanbin, just leave me alone' i harshly wipe off the tears. the agitation arises again and my clumsy fingers work to get rid of the bracelet.

i push myself away from him as he his hand hangs in the air.

i pull on it trying to break it apart atleast.

'kyujin it's fine, you are okay' his turns me around so i am facing him and with a single clasp the bracelet falls down on the floor.

i don't want to look at him, i don't.

'just stop, please' this is just another episode i need to get over, alone.

the longest chp so far. hopefully, now updates will be more frequent.

what do you think about kyujin? i don't know if i want to write some angst or fluff.