Like Real People Do - Jill Roord

It Happened Again

TW: PTSD, alcohol consumption

Mapi's POV

I clenched my eyes shut, hoping she couldn't feel the trembles of my hands as I combed through her hair. It broke my heart to hold her in my arms like this. It broke my heart that it had come to this; desperately trying to whisper something which would break through those walls of pain and trauma. 

Rocking both of us back and forwards, Hunter's sobs wracked against my chest and they were always a noise which would forever live in my mind. Someone so happy and once free was now falling apart and I couldn't hold her together; I'd desperately tried to gather the pieces but nothing would've worked. 

We'd learnt, over many years, that events like these were, so painfully, inevitable. All I could do is to hold her, so that's what I did. I prayed that there'd be a day when these episodes would be a distant memory but somehow I doubted that; every time it felt like she'd gotten away from the clouds of darkness, they seemed to come back even heavier. 

"I've got you," I whispered, not even knowing if she could hear me, "We're safe, we're going to be okay."

It was raw agony; that's what Hunter went through. These wounds hadn't healed, they'd only grown deeper and more painful over the years and I didn't know how to bandage them up so they'd get better. I'd do anything, the thought of it brought tears to my eyes which I choked down because I needed to be present to keep Hunter safe. My job in life was to keep Hunter safe; she was my girl, she was my best friend, she was the light that I looked for in the darkest of rooms. 

This is why I'd grown so protective of her. No one knew Hunter like Alexia and I did and I doubted anyone ever would because she hid these wounds so deep that her struggles weren't a thought on anyone's mind. They lived in my mind, that's why I called her everyday multiple times because if she needed me, then I'd be there. I'd do anything, I'd travel anywhere, I'd even sell my soul.

I just wanted her to be free from these chains and shackles that life had captured her in. 

How was it fair that a soul so free, like the wind and those paraquets which fly at the top of the rainforest, was chained to the gates of hell? Harley deserved to run around those fields with a smile shining on her face and her hair flowing but instead she drowned. She drowned in these tireless tides and currents which held her under the water until that very last second, giving her a moment of respite before choking her again; it was the cruelest of games. 

Suddenly, I felt her head drop, her breathing slowing slightly which would always frighten me at first. My heart would stop as I questioned if I'd lost her; the first time I was so certain that I had. But then I'd realize it was over, or at least this part was over, it was a relief but also so harrowing that her mind went to places so dark that her body was forced to shut down. 

My legs shaking slightly, I stood up, carrying her in my arms as her legs hung limply. Hunter had never been heavy so it wasn't a struggle to carry her to bed but it was a challenge to look down at her face. A face I knew to be this beacon of light and electricity was now better described as an image of death; she'd been to hell and somehow come back but it didn't come without consequences. 
Gently, I laid her in the bed, knowing she was safe now. I kissed her forehead, wishing she knew how much I loved her. I wiped the tears from my face, knowing I needed to be strong because Hunter needed me.

Looking back one last time, I jogged down the stairs, looking for Alexia who I eventually found in a conversation with Katie McCabe. As I was coming down the stairs, I saw Jill Roord eye's on me, looking confused but I had more important things to do than getting to know Arsenal's new midfielder. 

Apologetically, I pulled Alexia away from Katie. Alexia grinned, chuckling, "Thanks for getting me out of that one," then she saw my expression, her face turning worried, "What is it?"

We kept our voices hushed, not that it made a difference seeing as all the music blared loudly, "It happened again."

Alexia immediately knew what I meant, this had happened all too many times before, her breath hitching in her throat, "Is she okay?"

I nodded, "She's asleep now." Hunter definitely wasn't 'okay' but she wasn't in any imminent danger, which is what Alexia asked about. 

Alexia sprung into action, I knew she'd be hurting for her sister but she understood things needed to be done in order to get Hunter back to herself. Firstly, we pulled Leah to the side as Alexia spoke to her sternly, "I need you to take everyone to the club down the road. Now."

Leah furrowed her brows, "What? Why?" Leah knew more than most about Hunter seeing as they lived with one another, she was probably the only other person I trusted with Hunter other than Alexia.

"Hunter's not doing well," Alexia breathed, not even wanting to say the words because that made it true.

Leah's confusion grew to worry, "Is she okay?"

Alexia nodded, her energy still somehow being calm, "She will be but I need you to get everyone out of here."

"What should I tell them?" Leah asked, I knew she was trying her best to help but had too many drinks to think straight.

I quickly chimed in, "Say that Alexia is sick and that me and Hunter will stay to look after."

"Okay," Leah nodded, I knew she loved Hunter just from how quickly she tried to help.

I got Alexia to run out of the room so it looked at least somewhat believable but she actually ran upstairs to be with Hunter, meaning I could make sure Leah managed with the plan. Bless her heart, but she was a little too far gone.

"Text me when she's okay," Leah pleaded me, her eyes wide.

I nodded, "Of course."

Leah clapped her hands together, "Guys listen up!"

Everyone quickly turned around to face the blonde.

"Alexia isn't feeling so good but Mapi has shown me an amazing club so we can keep the party going! Hunter and Mapi are going to stay with Alexia, but she'll be fine. Do not fear Katie!"

Everyone seemed a little dazed, but I put it down to the alcohol. They followed Leah out of the door anyway, some of them still singing on the way out. 

Jill Roord walked closer to me, her eyes staring right into mine, "Is everything okay?" She asked, her head slightly lowered and her eyebrows furrowed.

For some reason, I felt as if I should tell her, something about her eyes matched with Hunter's. Of course though, I didn't, "It's all fine."

Jill didn't look convinced though knew not to push, "Okay, thanks for the night."

I tried my best to smile, however I doubt it worked, "Hope you enjoyed it."

And then Jill walked out of the door just like everyone else and we were left with an empty house. Just Alexia, Hunter and I were left.