Bunny & Mousey

Another Brick In The Wall.

We don't need no education.
We don't need no thought control.
Hey, teacher, leave us kids alone.
All in all, you're just Another Brick In The Wall.
Pink Floyd.

First day of spring Semester, 1980.
Six years earlier...

"Kari Byundlee? Miss, uhh... Bengdee? Bungay?"

"Present!"

I looked up with a grin. Our Biology 102 teacher had moved from Egypt to our Southern California suburb the previous semester, and Mr. Naboo's thick accent still had trouble with certain sounds. Kari Bentley, a tall brunette at the next table, politely ignored the gross mispronunciation of her last name, but it stuck with me. Her table mate Taylor, an equally tall strawberry blonde, also caught it and poked Kari in the ribs.

Without thinking, I leaned across the narrow aisle between our lab tables to whisper, "Bunny."

She gave me a nondescript look, but her bright brown eyes gleamed with curiosity. Betty Boop-length eyelashes blinked to me in some kind of mysterious code. "Huh? What?"

"Bunny. Um, Mr. Naboo. He called you Bunny..."

She mouthed Bunny to herself, then tossed a half smile my way. Turning away, she whispered in Taylor's ear. Their giggling brought the humorless teacher's frustrated attention upon all of us. I was still halfway out of my seat, and had many priors from the previous semester, so he knew in an instant who to blame.

Pointing a large and hairy finger, Mr. Naboo scolded, "Hey, clown! Don't... uhh... don't be clown."

The low level snickering at his clumsy English came from all but the most saintly students. While few of my classmates wanted to hang out with me, they all seemed to appreciate my talent for unwittingly and effortlessly disrupting a class.

Mr. Naboo's dark ears somehow managed to glow red, and he glared at the whole class in embarrassment, anger, or both. "Read page four. I need to take a call."

Just before he reached the door to his back room, I called out, "Sorry, Sir."

The hitch in his step shouted a sonic boom of irritation, but he managed to close the door behind him without further incident.

His absence triggered full blown laughter from the classroom of eleventh graders, but an uneasy mood accompanied the glory I felt.

They don't really like me, they just like seeing a teacher pissed off...

Obeying a sudden, irresistible impulse, I stood to my lanky 5'7" height, then took a bow. A few hands clapped, but most of the boys and all the girls rolled their eyes or shook their heads.

Except one. Miss Bunny is studying me...

Never one to quit while I wasn't too far behind, I tried rousing the class to sing the hit Pink Floyd rock anthem with me.

"We don't need no education, we don't need no thought contr..."

My voice trailed off as once again, striving for social leadership utterly failed. Completely defeated, I slumped into the chair to bury my face in the textbook. Mr. Naboo was sure to call on me when he came out, and I needed to be prepared with a perfect answer to foil his revenge. Having read the whole book on the day I got it, the material merely needed a quick review.