In the morning

Bunny eared pages: chapter 6

Something I like to tell myself everyday is that different, not because of the power thing, but because of the way I thought. I always heard kids in class talk of dreams, I just don't have them. Everyday I wonder what they are like, is there a key to having them? I also didn't read like the others, they saw words I saw shapes. All of this added with my misophonia was, the word isn't unbearable, but. Never mind maybe it is. Every night I stare at the ceiling wondering what dreams sounded like looked like. Wonder . What a cool word. Or should I say shape. Every time I enter the training center I hear "bash bash bash bash bash..." god it hurt, just hearing them punch the punching bag OVER AND OVER again. Makes me miss home. Not. My mom though. Plus at lunch I can tell these kids didn't grow up in the same society I did. "Smack smack smack smack.." UGGGHHHHHH its soooooooo annoying. I guess that's just how I work.

'Nock nock' oh shoot, I open the door and see Elix "you ok? You seem , late." I shrug walking with him catching up shortly after. "What are we doing today?" I ask. "Review." NOOOOO. "Mhm" I'm super tired. "How much sleep do you get on a daily basis?" I ask. "Ehhh, six- no. Six and a half hours a night." My jaw drops, HOW IS HE ALIVE. Ah the training center. My worst enemy. "Let's start with force fields i guess." "On it." While going on with training my mind wander off to its own world. Thinking of the one problem in life everyone has, not choosing to be born  . No one asks for it, but still everyone try's to make the most of life. That's the thing right? Trying. Reminds me of my mom, how hard she try's to keep our home. I don't think I can even call it home anymore.
        RING RING  "see y'a Alice." I don't feel like lunch today I'll just sit. Walking towards the lonely lunch table I get stares and whispers , I could make out a couple of words. "Weakling"and "newbie" gees these guys weren't original. Sitting down Myja plops herself right beside me. "Hiya Alice!" I wave. " I was wondering, who's your mentor?" "Elix, why?" She smiles "I know em he's a bit awkward." Awkward? I don't think he is. I shrug at her. "Um, what's- whats, sorry um. What's your favorite color?" I ask. I don't wanna be her friend. Mean. I know but, it feels like I'm replacing Ellie. It kinda feels like this with everyone now. "Ehhh , blue- no! Purple!" That was Ellie's favorite color. "I- I Um" tears well in my eyes no no no no. "I don't feel good." I say going to the nearest restroom. I try to see myself in the mirror. But all I see is Ellie. My back slides down the wall and I cry. Not a sob or a wail. But a soft cry, unlike Ellie's. She wailed loudly and couldn't help it. I look to the side and see a book nuzzled up in between the trash can and the wall. Picking it up I see the title "A Supernova of Stars" there were many bunny eared pages. Each one had a number one each start of their page. "8,5,12,16" I don't have the time and stuff it in between again. I stand up and collect myself wiping the tears from my eyes and circulating my breath again, until I didn't seem like I had cried my eyes out. On my way to the training center I get weird looks. Aren't I supposed to fit in here? Seems like all I am is different. I look at the door of the training center and there's a poster that says "TRAINING CANCELED- DO NOT ENTER" . Well that's good I guess. "ALLICCEEEE" I hear Myja scream. I turn around and see her about five feet away from me. "Wanna hang out? Y'a know since trainings canceled." "Sure Myja, whatcha wanna do?" She smiles even bigger. "Let's go to the community garden!" Community garden? That's new . I nod her way and we start walking. "Have you ever been there? I sure have. It my favorite place to go!" I shake my head . The door to the garden was clear and greenish. Walking in I see vines across the walls and plants of green ,blue ,yellow ,pink ,and red.  It was beautiful.
"It truly is amazing isn't it?" She laughs, picking up what I believe is a dandelion. " yeah, it is." I say. "Did you, ever , live out there . Like in a city?" I ask "nope! Born and raised here!" That's kind of sad. And also kinda weird , not once? I wonder why she wouldn't be allowed.