Princess Hope

chapter thirty-nine

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Andra stared at the ceiling for more than thirty minutes now. She tossed and turned before that. She grew restless but not for the reason, anyone would think.

She wasn't having cold feet. Andra was sure about marrying Hugh. There was no doubt about that for even a second.

Having enough of mindlessly staring at the ceiling, Andra sat up. Her hair was a mess, falling carelessly around her face. She decided to make her way to the kitchen.

The hallways of Clarence House were dimmed. Everyone was asleep. She shouldn't be awake. Her wedding was only a few hours away. But there was something bothering her, though she couldn't point out what it was.

Andra rustled through the refrigerator, looking for a small tin can of Eton mess especially made for her. Her father and brothers made sure that there was an Eton mess available anytime since she discovered her love for it.

Ah there it is, she smiled when she collected the small tin can.

"What are you doing?"

She jumped in surprised, holding her chest. "You scared me." Andra turned around, seeing Harry standing in the doorway.

"How have you been?" Harry carefully asked.

It was as if... he saw her as fragile. Like a glass that could break anytime.

"I'm doing better," she answered cordially.

It felt awkward. Almost like they hadn't known each other since birth.

"Uhh," Harry groaned. "Congratulations-"

"You don't have to say anything you aren't genuine about."

"I'm genuine."

"I didn't think you were happy about it. With the article and all."

"I didn't say I wasn't happy."

"You all but said that. You told everyone around the world that I wasn't in love with Hugh. Do you realize what you've put me in?"

Andra looked him in the eyes. She could see him swallow a lump in his throat. Cogs were turning his head. It was clear to her.

"I know," Harry said.

"Do you?" She asked, pointedly. Her brow raised.

"I do," he whispered.

"If it wouldn't be a scandal to not have you there," she closed her eyes, controlling her breathing. Andra could feel her temper rising out of hand. "I don't want to fight you anymore, Harry. I wish you all the happiness in the world. Please, don't destroy mine."

"Are you really happy?"

"I am contented and happy with my life." Andra stood her ground. Firm. She wanted him to know that she was genuinely happy.

"I'm sorry for everything."

She blinked.

It was unexpected.

An apology. From Harry.

After so long.

"I'm sorry, too." Andra let out a sigh, placing the tin can on the kitchen island. "I love you, Harry. I don't want to forgive you yet because I think you don't realize how much you've hurt me the past year and a half."

She raised her hand dismissively when Harry tried to speak. "I'm not done. When you frowned at my presence at your wedding, you hurt me. It wa humiliating that my own brother didn't want me at an important event in his life just because he thought I hated his wife. For the record, I defended your wife. I never hated her. I was only concerned that you were getting into something too fast, too reckless like Dad and Mummy. You hated me for it. You refused to let me be there for your son's christening.

"I grew up being loved by you, Will, and Dad. You three protected me from all the things that could've harmed me. You knew what happens if the tabloids wanted a story. Yet you, you sold me out to them. To the people responsible for the death of mummy."

"I'm sorry," he said.

Andra controlled her breathing, giving it her all to relax.

"I'm sorry I can't forgive you yet. It will take time and I intend to take that time. No matter if it's long or short."

"I won't be at the reception if it's uncomfortable for you-"

"No. You aren't missing my wedding. You think you're being selfless but you're not. You missed many things the past year. My engagement, my move to Cheshire - Will and Kate were there, you know. Even Bea and Zara helped with my move. So, no, you aren't missing the one time I get married."

Andra picked up a teaspoon and the tin can. She paused and gently squeezed Harry's shoulder as she passed him.

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