No Solace (The Flames of Retribution - Book 1)

Chapter Fifteen - The distances between belief and truth

Another month went by, and the Tavla's birthday was around the corner. We had been practicing so much, that I hadn't realized the excited buzz within the palace until Xīwàng sat me down in a chair and let me know what he'd planned.

"Since you missed your own birthday, I'd like to share mine with you." He beamed at me. He always smiled when we met up, now that we'd put our differences behind us. It was harder to win Perron back. He was still training me, but not with any good will. Sera had just grown quieter. She kept her mask on now at all times. 

"What day is your birthday?" I asked as I pushed away these thoughts. Everyone was crowing about it, but I hadn't heard an actual date from the servants, and Xīwàng had been quiet about it until then.

His grin faded into a sheepish smile. "I wasn't planning to celebrate it, but it is tomorrow," he admitted. "I wasn't going to, but then I realized my parents would have been sad to know I missed it. If I can help them rest peacefully, then I'll take that day to keep smiling for them. What better way to smile, then make the day special for you."

 I felt a pang in my heart. My father loved making a big deal of my birthday. Xīwàng wanting to share his, sent echoes of my father through my mind. I tried to smile at him, but the tightening in my throat made it difficult.

 He took my hand, oblivious to my dampening spirits. "The elders have asked that we perform the dance tomorrow. What say you about that?"

I squirmed at that but there was no reason not to. I could perform it with no errors - even the kiss. "Yes. It does seem to fit well with the day, doesn't it? Did you know the ancient god Shiva was known as the Lord of the Dance?"

Xīwàng smiled. "No, but that sounds a bit like Tav. Perhaps there's a mystery there."

Tomorrow evening, then, I would go to the temple and speak with one of the elders, and he or she would tell me what blessing Tav had for our union. That had me worried. It was one thing to complete this charade, but I wasn't sure what Faluel or Tav would think of such a thing. I doubted I would be given any blessing.

 Xīwàng traced his fingertip down my cheek. "You seem unhappy."

I met his gaze and chose my words with care. Bringing up my worries about the dance would just be fruitless when I'd agreed to commit to this.  I attempted another smile as I said, "Ah... it's nothing. Just thinking of my father. Birthdays were a special time for him. I'm really looking forward to spending your birthday with you. But..."

"...but it hurts to celebrate your own."

"Yes."

He touched my hair, then my hands. Gripping them, he pulled me up from my seat. "We'll go out into the city today."

 I blinked up at him. "Are you sure, Xīwàng?"

"Why wouldn't I be?" 

Well, there was the whole matter of Calashan women having to go around in palanquins. Just going out would involve me putting on a mask and being hidden away. Going into anyplace public wouldn't be much fun. I'd have to stay in the box. It was why, up until this point, I hadn't truly seen the city. 

"Isn't Perron going to scold that Calashan women must never have fun? They can't be seen looking happy." I imitated his tone and voice, making Xīwàng grin.

"You and Perron are like oil and flame."

"Isn't the old saying oil and water?"

"Yes, but that is not how you and Perron are."

"So, who is the oil and who is the flame?"

"Ah, you are the flame, indeed. You rouse enormous reactions in others, and I've no doubt we'll be surrounded by ashes when this is over."