Joffrey Baratheon: Greatest Estate Developer

Chapter Four: The Greyjoy Rebellion Begins

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(The following text was transcribed from the personal journal of Loyd Frontera, aka Joffrey Baratheon, detailing his experiences during his time spent fostering in the Reach.)

It works! Somehow it works; we managed to test it against some abandoned hulks at the port.

I am writing this entry from the deck of the ship we are using to ferry our cannon surprise to the Iron Fleet. The cannon is still a bit rough on the edges but it works. I think.

We ferry it using a mule and a wheeled cart, installed in a old fishing boat we managed to adapt and, before cast it in the water, we tried a lucky shot with a charge of large grains and a ceramic cannon balls.

The Hightower guards complained about the noise but ran with their tails between their asses as we told them we were making experiments with wildfire. 

The hard part was granularity, make the black powder too grainy and it will work well in little weapons like pistols and muskets. But in cannons it will fail to react properly with the oxigen in the air causing loss of power and risks of an accident.  Cannon balls need bigger fat grains of gunpowder to ignite properly and. If wasn't for my enhanced resistance due the mana channeling I probably would have loss a couple fingers already in some "accidents" mixing and preparing the munitions. But now I have the loads fixed in nice fiber bags, making the reload easier and safer to proceed.

Now I need to recruit a crew so we can sail these gunboats to Lannisport. Once Euron attacks the city, we use the element of surprise and sink as many beached boats from the Ironfleet as we can before running out. If everything goes well, we can kick the Greyjoys in the teeth before they understand what is happening. I just hope we don't die trying.

(...)

Officially, I am fostering with the Hightowers as I complete my "studies" at the citadel. Extra-officially, I am trying to gain prestige so I can build a better and more comfortable life for myself before the Ice Apocalypse hits the fan.

In order to gain access to Lannisport, I need permission to leave Old Town. Said permission consists of an escort of Citadel soldiers who will protect me from any harm. So far, I managed to convince the Captain of the Royal Guard, Ser Boros Blount, to let me go with a small group of soldiers. Our little expedition is lead by Garth Hightower, second son of Lord Leyton Hightower.

What I didn't say to them is that I also brought some "friends" in our little fleet of ships that know how to operate my new cannons. I used potato juice to keep the powder moist so we could transport it without risk. The bronze cannons I cast for converting these fishing boats into gunboats cost me all my dragon coins. But it will be worth it once we manage to sink the Greyjoy ships with it!

We left Old Town early this morning, heading to the port to meet my grandfather, Lord Tywin Lannister. I am eager to see my "father" again, as weird as it may sound. The Rebellion is about to begin if it already not began.

Roughly 3 days after leaving Old Town, we were sailing across the coast when we saw the Iron Fleet anchored at Lannisport, smoke rising from the occupied port city as the battle still raged.

We made a detour to dock at the Lynwood docks and then waited until night fell. Once it became dark, we made a night raid and started firing our first cannon with the help of a few lanterns the Greyjoy men lit on the deck of their longships to provide illumination.

We fired several times and watched the Ironborn scramble for cover.

The Ironborn never saw cannon fire in their lives. So as we shoot their ships, they ran in panic like headless chickens without a clue as to what was attacking their ships.

The Ironborn panicked and scattered to every corner of the port, some diving into the water.

Some yelled "Dragon" and looked at the dark, moonless sky, looking for a clue as to where the shots were coming from. It was the perfect moment for us to fire the second bombardment we had prepared.

We fired a barrage of lead cannonballs, destroying almost all of the Iron Fleet who dared came near our ship. We fired every ship being towed or anchored near the docks, their more reasoned (or less crazy) sailors, trying to disengage and run for the open seas. Many Ironborn died from the exploding balls. I waited for most of them leave the waters of Lannisport before ordering to dock. There was still Ironborn troops scattered across the city, men too lost, or too drunk, to hear the retrieval order. Too bad to them as Sandor Clegane, Boros Blount and the Hightower men disenbarked at the harbors and begin to beat the absolute shit out of the Ironborn. I didn't wanted to participate in the fight, of course, knowing no one would let a little kid like myself to risk his life like that. even with my superhuman abilities. But on the other hand... My luck sucks... For as I retired myself to sleep a little, a few of the Ironborn tried to attack us with their own weapons. They were too using our own trick, by aproaching using rowboats hidden by the dark of the night.

(P.O.V change, Samwell Tarly)

Joffrey tossed and turned in his sleep, only succeeding in tying himself up in knots within his hammock. We had a long night shooting Iron Ships, as I and the Prince where the only ones who knows how to operate the cannons. I struggled to disentangle myself from the hammock with little success as I kept thinking.



Surely I wasn't that inept?



The thought bounced for a while on his head before...



Yes, yes he was.



To have killed people with the cannons, for denying their lives like this...



Nope.



With a small shriek of rage he finally disentangled himself only to land on the hard wood below. He yelped and cursed as he massaged the small bump that was slowly forming on his head.



That's it. I'm talking to the captain now and I don't care if he's asleep or not.



He promptly strode out the room, dodging the swaying, sleeping forms of his fellow seamen. Once in the small hallway he made his way up to the Captain's room. Only it was already open.



That's strange. Samwell thought in his sleep addled state. He entered the room, and promptly stopped cold. Inside was the Captain alright, he was still on his hummock, unmoving as the blood seeped out of him from his throat. Standing beside him was a back cloaked shape, his hand clutching a bloody axe.



Tarly stood there, frozen as the figure turned around and titled its head in genuine surprise. "My my, look what we have here... my red pets will love to get a handle on you boy." Said the figure, dripping with contempt.



Samwell Tarly snapped out of his trance, as prince Joffrey came out of nowhere, grabbed the Captain's sword on the nearby table and launched himself at the hooded assassin with a scream. He's axe moved unnaturally fast as he parried all of Joffrey's attacks with ease and countered with a painful hack at his arm that made him drop his sword. "Pathetic... To think your Father slayed the Targaryen warriors as if they were nothing..." he shook his head. "Come, you'll make a fine addition to my collection." He said as he advanced on him. Joffrey leapt back, clutching Samwell's arm as he run out of the cabin, shouting.



"WE ARE UNDER ATTACK! TO ARMS!! TO ARMS!!!" he bellowed with all his being as he raced out into the deck. Outside lay the bodies of the night watchmen, and countless black forms scuttling about, searching and looting. He could hear fighting below the decks...



He felt a thundering pain on his back as he stumbled forward, feeling the flowing blood coursing down his backside. Behind him stood Euron Greyjoy, The One Eyed Raven, the killer, illuminated by the pale moonlight. The strange smog that clouded everywhere seemed to clear for a few seconds, he and Joffrey saw beside him a couple rowboats, sporting more boarding Ironborn. "I love it when they run, but its time to meet the rest of your future crew, little prince." Euron said as he played with his axe and advanced on him, arms intent on grabbing him. Below, the fighting had obviously stopped, as the only sound he heard now was the eerie silent shuffling of the men under the assassin's command.



Joffrey stumbled back, thoughts racing. Who was this... man?! Where was the rest of the crew? How had they boarded without so much as a sound?!



Finally his back hit the railing, and Joffrey muffled a grunt of pain as his back flared. "They're all dead... Nowhere left to run little prince. It's me or the Drowned God now." He said as he flashed a cruel, anticipating smile. It was the only part visible between the darkness and the cowl.



Joffrey looked back to the strangely still water, then back at the man that had so effortlessly disarmed him. "I don't know who the hells you are or what you want to do to me, but I'll stop you."

Samwell gasped as prince Joffrey jump, channeling mana to the tip of the captain's sword. Euron Greyjoy just smiled. He dodged effortlessly the sword that imbedd itself on the mast and prepared a blow to the prince's neck. Samwell Tarly didn't thought on what he was doing at the moment. He just acted.

He picked a axe from a fallen sailor on the graound and, closing his eyes he yelled jumping with all his mana channeled to his members. He swung with all his might, and the axe embedded itself deep into Euron's chest, breaking into his armor as if it was made of paper, and he fell to the ground, coughing blood.

"H-how?" Samwell asked as he tried to pull the weapon free.

"You did it Tarly, You kill the Kraken!" said one surviving sailor who was fighting the Ironborn that came to help us.

The battle was over as quick as it began after Samwell Slayed Euron Greyjoy.

When the morning light came, we saw the destruction we had caused: a tenth of their fleet was sunken, and the rest ran away with a few more damaged vessels lagging behind. even if our men haven't done a great deal of damage to their numbers. The morale of the Ironborn was severely damaged thanks to the effectiveness of our cannons in their psychology.







Westerosi never saw cannons before after all.



I sent some men to Casterly Rock to seek the local garrison with a message to my grandfather Tywin about our timely arrival. In the end the severed head of Euron was all needed to make they all so afraid of us that they ran away instead of fighting. They didn't even have the guts to try and board our ships.



After that, I ordered my people to stay in Lannisport and begin helping the townspeople that hide from the reavers. There is much to rebuild. Luckily for them Joffrey Baratheon is the Greatest Estate Designer!







End of Chapter.