Holly

Redemption

I know they hate it. I can see their eyes glancing at me and feel the stares at my back. The thing about small towns like this one, no one wants to confront a stranger. It is clear that I am breaking the rules, but it is also clear that no one wants to remind me.

I take a deep breath from the cigarette and blow out, adding to the annoyance of the bartender who has the misfortune of being close to my seat.

"Done for the night?" He huffs.

I drop my head a little and let out a sigh. "Another whisky." My voice is gruff from a lack of use.

"Fine." A few seconds later he places a new glass of hard liquor in front of me and walks away.

I look at the cigarette in my hand, halfway through its use. It bores me so I snuff out the flame in my empty glass.

When life is dark and unforgiving, time goes by slowly. It hardens you every fucking second you breathe and things you used to enjoy gets boring.

"Hi, honey." I feel a delicate hand grace my shoulder. "It has been a while. More than a month."

I only give her a piece of my attention when I look over my shoulder just enough to see her lips pout. "I've been busy."

"Too busy for me?" she whines.

The bar is full of them. I should have known this one would find me. I spent one night with her and unfortunately, she didn't forget.

I groan internally and turn around. If I can't enjoy my cigarette, maybe she will please me.

"Come here, darling."

She smiles and presses herself against my side. I breathe in the scent of cherries, but it doesn't make me feel the same way it did before. I feel a block in my throat and nausea rising in my gut.

She has been with too many men. I can't say I'm any better considering the number of women I have slept with. But this time it is different. It feels... wrong.

I pull away from her and she whines again.

"Babyyyyyyy. What is wrong?"

"You're annoying me with your voice."

"What?"

"You ever get tired of putting on that much makeup? How long does it take to put on that fake ass mask?"

She shoves my chest. "Stoooooopppp. Why are you being mean?"

I take a sip from my whisky. "You smell too sweet. A skunk smells better than whatever perfume you are wearing."

"How mean! Apologize!"

I chuckle. "Should I apologize in English," I lean towards her "or in Italian?" She hates me now, but she loved how I spoke Italian to her a month ago.

"You are a monster!"

I down my glass of whisky and revel in how it burns my throat. "Don't be so dramatic. I'm looking for redemption, honey." I give her a wide grin and she storms off.

Now that was a little less boring.

I put the drink down on the counter and stand to leave the bar. The wind is cold and humid, but it feels good on my hot skin from the alcohol.

Why was she such a turn off? Normally, sex is the only thing that isn't boring these days.

As I approach the shoreline and leave the town, I can feel the air warm slightly. The closer I get to the shore, the warmer I feel.

That's right. She is the reason why I can't have any fun.

I take off my shoes, jeans, and t-shirt and tuck them in a bush before walking onto the beach and up to the water. It is dark and the moonlight only lights up my chest as I face the sea. The waves look dark and cold, and I become excited to enter.

Her eyes. I can feel them on my back. I know she cannot see much but she knows I'm here. I've only been in this town for a week, but she is always there studying late at night. Normally, I would avoid people and if it was anyone else, I would enter the water at a different location on the beach.

But not for her.

When I shift, I feel the animalistic anger boil up in me. But when she watches me, I feel calm and warm.

I never looked at her directly. All I know is that she is there. So tonight, I can't help but look back at her.

For any human, she would be hard to see. For me, I can see her clearly. Her doe eyes are wide and curious as she watches me. Her lips slightly parted and her curly hair caresses her slim cheek.

I feel the waves slap against my legs and the call to go to her becomes too strong.

So, I dive into the water to get away.