• Teru x Akane • "Whatever." •

"Hurting outside."

Heavy TW for this chapter I'm sorryy
Tw for:
Self Harm
Thoughts of overdose
Suicidal thoughts
Depression meltdowns

Akane woke up on Teru's couch once again, Static playing on the tv he was watching prior to him falling asleep. Apparently everyone had gone home.

His head was pounding and to be completely honest he felt like shit.

He didn't even wanna open his eyes, he just woke up and everything felt horrible already.. he had a headache and he couldn't even think or concentrate on anything at this point.

He felt like a shell of a human.

What was happening? He's never felt like this before.

He felt an aching pain but it didn't feel quite physical.

He felt dreadful, he felt so.. awful that he just wanted to die in that moment.

His eyes fluttered open as he couldn't even remember where he was for a second.

He stumbled up and struggled to walk to Teru's bathroom.

"Fuckfuckfuck.."

Akane shakily opened the bathroom door and shut it immediately after going inside.

He slid down the bathroom wall, suddenly realizing how much he was sweating.. he felt incredibly irritable.

He held onto the bathroom sink, desperately trying to support himself up straight.

He looked in the mirror and thoughts started to rush through his head.

"What if someone knocks?" "Stupid.."

But then— the thoughts started morphing into all the dumb and toxic shit Akane's done up until this point that's made him a horrible person.

"Boyfriend-Stealer." "Know-it-all." "You're the reason your mom was so unhappy." "You're heartless." "You shouldn't have told your dad what you heard, your mom would've still been around." "Stupid fucking mistake."

"Why do you even bother living? Why can't you just slit your own throat and get it over with already? No one wants you around."

The thoughts were overwhelming and tears staring welling up in Akane's eyes.

He started searching around for.. something

Something to maybe- quiet the thoughts rushing through his head.

Then he found it.

A pack of razor blades, finally.

Akane sat back down on the floor and whimpered to himself.

There was no need for rolling up his sleeves, the shirt he was wearing had short ones.. which makes things easy.

Tears rolled down Akane's face as he felt like puking, he pictured the shitty things that make him deserve this.

Kissing Mitsuba.

Making Teru feel worthless.

Hurting his friends multiple times.

Hurting Teru.

Akane subconsciously pressed down the sharp blade against his under wrist, ending up praying for the courage to slide across.

And he does.

He tries to cover up his pained grunts as he watches the crimson blood leak from his arm and onto the razor.

Until he hears..

"Akannee? Yo? You in there?"

Aw fuck, Kou.

Akane panicked as he jumped up and rushed over to the sink, Trying his very best to wash off his wrist and the blade at once.

"WAIT—! I'M.. BUSY!" Akane said as he tried ignoring the burning pain where he cut himself.

"Are you okay? Do you need um...- some Pepto Bismol?"

"PLEASE— GO AWAY ,KOU!"

"Okay.. you can get through this?? I guess?"

Akane sobbed silently as he put away the now clean blade and practically glued his left arm to his torso, attempting to cover up his new scar.

He wiped away his tears as he realized all the thoughts running through his head earlier were now gone.

He felt??- better. Not fantastic or anything but it was a improvement.

He opened the bathroom door to see Kou watching some goofy action movie, Akane let out a relieved sigh which led to Kou turning his head and giving a cheerful smile.

"I thought you wouldn't come out! You had me worried!" Kou commented.

"...yeah. Where's Mits-...UHH where's Teru?"

"Kane.. I literally could not care less if you talk about Mitsuba, I know you wouldn't do that to me! We're besties!" Kou smiled reassuringly.. but the tone in his voice sounded slightly worried.

"Yeah, sorry." Akane said as his mind went blank, looking around the room with dull eyes.

"Anyyywhoo! They went to a convenient store togetherr cuz I didn't feel like going anywhere but I got hungry.. sooooooo!!!" Kou replied as he plopped backwards on the couch.

Akane just nodded as he wandered upstairs while Kou continued watching TV.

He entered Kou's room, he doesn't know why but it just sorta happened.

But then the thoughts came swarming back.

"Remember when you made fun of your bestfriend and kissed his boyfriend?" "Y'know how you completely brushed it off and acted like nothing happened after a short time?"

"What would happen if you swallowed all of those?" The thoughts started to torment Akane as he looked over and saw a bottle of aspirin on Kou's dresser.

But Akane turned his head the other way.

He couldn't do this.

Or at least not right now.

Not with Kou here.

I think Akane's already hurt him too much.

Just wait for Mitsuba and Teru to get back.

You'll be fine.

You can do this.

Hold out a little longer.

Maybe things aren't so bad after all.

Just.. maybe? For once it'll be okay.

When the two boys get back Akane will probably be back to his normal self.

A smart ass spending time with his friends.

Even if one of those friends got cheated on for aka—

Nope.

I literally just said not right now.

Whatever.

~~~~

MUWYAHAHAHAHHA SAD DEPRRESSION CHAPTER MUWHAAH